quote of the day: no arsehole for it

Following yet another demoralising loss, this time at the hands of Man City, in addition to the loss of two key but oft-out-of-commission players, Michael Owen and Joey Barton, Newcastle manager Joe Kinnear told it exactly how it was:

"It's devastating when you look at a club like Tottenham offering £16m for this player, £14m for that player. I would love to go and spend millions like that and I wish I was in the position to do so. But you can see why a lot of big [managerial] names out there didn't have the arsehole to take this job. You can see why so many people bottled it."

Fuck the Super Bowl

Steroid Boy Couldn't Even Beat Up That Ginger Kid From The Partridge Family!

The Case of the Missing Masal Bugduv, Football Hero Or Myth?

Faint echoes of Sid Finch perhaps but this recently culled article fascinates with the curious case of Masal Bugduv, the missing Moldovan.

Perhaps the funniest bit of all is how these wank Arseholenol supporters fell right in....

Good stuff.

Favourite Kick In The Teeth of the Week:

So Dan Shaughnessy writes this torrid screed, this powerpuking stream of bile about the Cardinals being such quitters that he provokes someone to write in my favourite kick in the teeth of the week in reply:

This is the thanks we get for handing you Curt Schilling on a silver platter? Did you already forget that without this gift, you never even beat the Yanks in '04? Or win your first World Series title in 86 years?

But go ahead...keep crying about the Cardinals quitting that day...knowledgeable fans call it resting...that's what smart teams do when they're banged up and have the division in the bag. And I'd rather my team be known as quitters than cheaters anyway. I couldn't be happier that you choked away your perfect season in Arizona. Enjoy watching the game in the freezing cold...I hope you have a thousand, excruciating flashbacks. by CardsFan1 January 18, 7:35 AM

Here, here. Fuck the Patriots and all their spoiled little fans.

The Championship Weekend
Are There Enough Reasons There Will Be No All-PA Super Bowl?

Good gawd, was that Cardinals beating of Carolina and Jake Delhomme's 5 interception bloodshed one of the most unexpected things in recent NFL post-season memory? Let's face it, even if you detest the success of the QB Jesus as much as I do, the Cards look like they're coming together a bit both defensively and with respect to their running game. I simply can't support them. It's the joke card.

The Titans beat themselves against the Ravens thus in some ways you have to believe the Ravens are sort of here by default.

The Jints, as I suspected, folded. Yes, the Iggles were tough. Yes, the Iggles are on a great run since Donovan was McBenched but let's face it, they didn't really stop the run (one senses the myth of the Iggles defence is overblown) and it was really more a matter of how much Eli sucked than how good the D was.

The Steelers were saved in a way by the football bouncing off a helmet, Charger Luck, let's call it. But they won fair and square and they're home again against a Raven team they've lucked out again twice already this season.

Still, a better result last week picking winners, 3-1.

IGGLES @ CARDINALS

So what's on about these Cardinals then? The league laughingstocks all season long are suddenly looking ominous and formidable? Everyone is on about Fitzgerald this week, but the real tough guy of this Cardinals receiving corps is Anquan Boldin, who made the four tough guys list:

Anquan Boldin suffered such an injury in Week 4 against the Jets in the Meadowlands. When Boldin was hit from behind by Kerry Rhodes it drove his head into the oncoming helmet of Eric Smith. The collision was so violent it made Kurt Warner start thinking seriously about stepping away from the game.

Boldin was left with a concussion, two facial fractures and a jaw that had to be reattached using eight plates and 40 screws. Upon leaving surgery Boldin refused post-op analgesics, declaring simply, "I don't do pain meds."

Aye, funny man, calling who, all the people in Philly who wanted to dump him into the river two months ago?

*I made the mistake of calling for an All-PA Super Bowl a few years ago. Philly made it but the Steelers lost to the Patriots and McNabb ended up puking on the field in the Super Bowl.

*The Eagles are really the only team left to root for, so I will. Which means they will lose. The Steelers and Big Ben have had their Super Bowl, ditto the QB Jesus, ditto Ray Lewis and the Ravens. I mean, the Eagles - Ravens is the Super Bowl matchup I want to see which means there's like zero chance of that ever happening now. That's the results gods for me. Pick a team to like and guaranteed they will lose.

*The Phillies have already won the World Series for Philly. Do you REALLY think Philadelphia is going to be the host of TWO World Championship teams?

Yeah, the Iggles beat the piss out of the Cards on Thanksgiving to a 48-20 tune but we all know that means nothing now. The Cards defence has been a turnover machine, forcing 9 in their two playoff games. Turnovers are often a secret of success. That and of course, their suddenly invigorated running game. In fact, if the Cards are able to beat the Iggles, it will be down to the running game keeping the blitzing Iggles defence off-balance.

Another factor to consider is how miserable the Iggles have been historically in NFC Championship games. They've won only once in four tries so far.

I'm riding on one thing and one thing only, Kurt Warner and his obnoxious wife nauseate me. Even god is sick of the pair of them by now.

That, and the Iggles having outscored opponents by a 20-0 margin in the 4th quarters of the playoffs.

The Cardinals are the biggest underdog in this round since the 1979 Tampa Bay Buccaneers, who were getting 3½ points from the Los Angeles Rams in the NFC title game. The Rams won and covered, 9-0. The previous year, the Rams were 4-point home underdogs to the NFC title game to the Dallas Cowboys. Dallas prevailed, 28-0.

The Cardinals receivers will definately cause some problems for the Philly defensive backfield but the difference between this and last week may be that Warner isn't going to have sufficient time to look at all his receivers. He's going to be harried and he's going to make a few mistakes this time.

The key will be to take the game away from the crowd early on - say, a Philly interception and an early Philly score. Momentum shift to the Cards for the most of the rest of the game before a big, big Philly comeback in the 4th quarter.

PHUCK IT: PHILLY 33 Arizona 28


*****

RAVENS AT STEELERS
The Ravens at the Steelers is certainly just going to be one side smashing the other smash smash smash smash smash. The Ravens have a rookie QB and a rookie coach, neither of which has mattered one iota since the start of the post season. The Ravens are Rollin and that's all there is to it. Not striking fear in everyone's hearts like they did a few years back whilst mauling the Jints in the Super Bowl, but nobody wants to see this defence.

IF the Steelers can run on the Ravens, they will win, simple as. That's what they did to the Chargers, demoralised them with their running game and that's what they'll have to do this weekend.

WILLIE PARKER HAS NEVER RUSHED FOR MORE THAN 63 YARDS VS. BALtimore.

Fewest yards allowed by conference title foes
Season Teams Average
1973 Oakland at Miami 230.0
1971 Baltimore Colts at Miami 232.6
1978 Dallas at L.A. Rams 246.9
1969 Kansas City at Oakland 247.6
2008 Baltimore at Pittsburgh 249.1

Something else to think about: Ben Roethlisberger was sacked an NFL-high 46 times in the regular season. Think blitz-happy Ravens aren't excited about this? That's why the Steelers MUST run the ball with success to advance.

The Steelers have won 7 of the last 8 games they've hosted the Ravens in.

Steelers were lucky in two meetings this season. Baltimore had more yards, time of possession and first downs than Pittsburgh in the first game and in the second game, the Ravens led almost the entire second half, until the Steelers scored on a controversial touchdown with 50 seconds left. They were lucky against the Chargers last weekend and Big Ben isn't likely to help hand the game to the Ravens like the Titans did last week.

So the way I see this game developing is that the Steelers will try and run and they probably won't have alot of success and Big Ben will throw a pass or two and get beaten up good every time he does.

The Ravens offence, I think, just doesn't have the tools to take on the Steelers' LBs and overall defence.

STEELERS 17 RAVENS 13

DIVISIONAL PLAYOFFS; ANOTHER GRAND OPPORTUNITY TO PROVE PREDICTIVE INEPTITUDE

A normal man would throw in the towel by now. Final week's prediction nearly all going pear-shaped. Wrong on 3 out of 4 Wild Card Playoff Games. Why stop now? Perhaps Sports Amnesia can set an historic mark for wrong-headedness.

Analyse what?

I'm just going to root for the teams I hate least at this point and frankly, if I had my druthers we'd be seeing a Philly @ Carolina NFC Final and a Ravens @ Steelers AFC Final with an All-Pennsylvania Finale on the mark in conjunction with the Phillies' World Baseball title.

But just because I want it means it probably won't happen. In fact, bet on it not happening. Ideally what I should start doing is picking against my gut instincts, the opposite of whatever I think initially.

Briefly, that wildcard weekend was more shocking than anyone expected. Manning out in OT without a chance to even touch the ball before losing? Boo hoo. The Colts vauted O, buried as it was so deep in its territory so often, failed to do the business when it mattered most and hell, getting held to such a low score by the Chargers Defence is simply absurd. They didn't deserve to advance. Really. And now I am forced to wonder if Dungy retires whether or not all those big name coaches like Cowher and Shanahan and Holmgren would fall all over themselves to coach the Colts and Manning. That's coach integrity for you. Say one thing, do another. But I kind of doubt Dungy will retire on such a sour note.

Would serve everyone right to have the Dumpster Super Bowl; Cardinals v Chargers.

SATURDAY


RAVENS AT TITANS: i agree with anyone who thinks that these two toughest defences are going to shut down the running games of each other and leave the QBs and special teams to make the difference. What does that mean? Rookie against Has-Been-Revived Been?

Ravens D is slightly better at creating turnovers and give up slightly fewer TDs.

Who cares what happened in these previous matchups? This is going to be a slugfest just like the earlier 13-10 match this season, that's all you need to know.

Here's something hidden to root for: Kerry Collins gets knocked out and Vince Young nearly brings Titans back from big deficit to create a nice QB controversy for next season.

Factors: Ravens have momentum. Titans have more experience at head coach and QB.

Prediction: Ravens 17 Titans 16.


Please, please don't give these two a platform anymore...

CARDINALS AT PANTHERS: Ok, nearly the entire world wrote off the Cardinals D and the Jesus Freak QB and yet here they are, on the verge of the NFC Championship game.

Ideally, the two things to consider is Arizona's 0-5 record on the East Coast and getting absolutely rubbished in all of those games. Versus the Panthers' 8-0 record at home, which included a defeat of these very same Cardinals.

Of course, it all means nothing.

Offensively, it's Carolina's running game against Arizona's Jesus Attack. Defensively, a virtual toss-up bar the Cardinal propensity to surrender big passing TDs on the East coast.

Prediction: Panthers 23 Cardinals 17 in Overtime.

SUNDAYS GAMES


EAGLES AT GIANTS: A sure bloodbath. Two cities that hate each other, two defences that can put on some hurting, one defending World Champion the other one of the hottest teams in football. Of course the Colts proved being hot is meaningless in the scheme of the postseason apparently.

No Plax means Eli Manning has no deep threat, go-to-guy to rescue him in what is sure to be a smothering, blitzing Philly defence.
Nice ugly defensive game.

Early on, the Giants are rested but the Iggles can ride a hot McNabb much in the same way the Giants can ride a hot Jacobs on the run. If the Iggles can stop him and force Manning to win it, I say Manning has shot his wad. Maybe even his career wad with that game last season in the Super Bowl. Since he was benched midway through week 12, McNabb has thrown 10 touchdowns with two interceptions, and the Eagles are 5-1.

The Jints are not rolling into the postseason like last year. They're sort of sliding in on the heels of losing three of their last four.

The last time they slid into the playoffs was in 2006, when they lost six of their last eight and ended up losing a first-round game at Philadelphia, 23-20, on a last-second field goal. And that year they at least had a rousing, season-saving 34-28 win in Washington in Week 17.

They have never before lost three of their final four games before opening the playoffs.

This game is a pure toss up. I don't even think homefield advantage matters in this one. Let's not forget thought that the Iggles are only two weeks away from that abysmal performance against the Deadskins and are always a threat to bury themselves with their own mistakes.

Prediction: Iggles 20 Giants 10


CHARGERS AT STEELERS: Chargers are THE hot team going into this weekend but then again, the Steelers haven't played yet and they survived one of the most brutal schedules in the league.

Philip Rivers is 14-0 in December games and he is 3-2 in the postseason not to mention the fact he is at the top of his game at just the right time.

Again, the fact that the Chargers are playing like they should have been all season means this game is probably a toss up.

Dunno how Darren Sproles is going to do against the Steeler defence in the frigid air now that LD alleges he's probably not going to be able to go in a key playoff game for the second year running but this story on Sproles is fascinating or, at the very least, historical:

Well, no one can resist that sort of story, right? We all have a little bit of the scout in us, right? We all want to say we saw Springsteen before he got big, we caught Tom Hanks at a dinner theater, we bought a priceless painting from some street artist before she became famous. So I went to the game and watched a tiny little football player, who looked barely old enough to cross the street without holding hands, play on a high school football field under spotty lights. I saw him disappear and reappear. I saw him split in two and then split in two again. I saw him fly and stretch like a rubber band and transform himself into different shapes. He was remarkable.

I'm certainly going to be rooting for him.

Whilst the Steeler defence is notably difficult to overcome, the Chargers defence has been transformed under Ron Rivera, who took over for the fired Ted Cottrell. James Harrison, Defensive Player of the Year, leads the Steelers. Two brutal defences and I'm going to go out on a limb and state that given two great QBs and two great defences, the winner of this game is going to get to the Super Bowl.

Prediction: Steelers 23 Chargers 20.