Bracket Virology

Well, time for that annual bout of comedy and humiliation called making the bracket selections for March Madness, the NCAA Tournament. Another one of those bad habits that can't be beaten into submission.

As tradition requires, two different brackets were set up, one to depict upon close examination or records, momentum, roster and coaching, the probable outcome despite not having seen a single NCAA basketball game all season albeit perhaps one or two highlights during oh, say the Big East or ACC tournament. We'll call this the Factual Bracket, simply to gauge the absurdity factor.

The second bracket was constructed of guesses and "feelings". Based upon what you say when you have already admitted to not having seen a single game in its entirety all season? Why based of course, upon that incisive factor; the Who Do I Want To Root For factor meaning picking only teams I want to root for. What is the criteria that makes me want to root for a particular school? Why the logic buggers comprehension.


Without judging harshly, is it any wonder U Conn blew it?

Anyway, without preamble, I bring you the Sweet Sixteen of my Factual Bracket: We'll start with the good news in the East, a perfect record: NC, Washington State, Louisville and Tennessee. Of course, bearing in mind these are seeds 1 through 4 it doesn't really take a work of genius to figure.

In the Midwest, not quite so lucky, or 50% of the possible four I chose made it in: of Kansas, Clemson, Wisconsin and Georgetown, only Kansas and Wisconsin are still in it. Clemson, we now know, never made it past Villanova in the first round and Georgetown were upset by 10th seeded Davidson just last night. Of course, they told me there would be no 10th seeded teams in the tourney this far in but what do "they" know anyway?

Over in the South, more of the same: Memphis and Texas, the two top seeded teams made it forward whilst my other two imaginative choices, Pitt and Marquette, the 4th and 6th seeds, fell by the wayside, in Round Two to Michigan State and Round One to Kentucky, respectively.



Lastly in the West another meagre display; two of the four remaining sides were successful: UCLA and West Virginia, the 1st and 7th seeds but hardly shocking. Not as shocking as seeing the other two choices, U Conn and Purdue, the 4th and 6th seeds, fail to make it through.

So, in the closest guess to reality the result stands at 16 possible winners, 10 chosen.



In the other bracket, the one based upon wishes and teams I wanted to root for, the exact same number correct although in the East, a less than perfect score but in the South, I've got Memphis and Stanford in the Elite Eight, three of four possibilities still alive.

All in all, considering the pair o brackets, sticking close to the vest with few insanely dodgy upset selections, a typical season concluding of course, in all instances of a NC v UCLA Final. Variations on a Theme.

NOT SO PERFECT ANY MORE


author of my favourite quote of the night which was actually just a requote of a Mike Tyson quote: "Every one has a plan until they get punched in the face."

Last night Superman's cape was not only tugged on but ripped from his shoulders as the NY Giants dished out a highly unexpected loss to the New England Patriots in Super Bowl XLII last night at University of Phoenix Stadium by a 17-14 margin.

In doing so the Giants not only became World Champions but ended the Patriots 18 game unbeaten run and perhaps FINALLY put to rest this long-running Boston as King Sports Town silliness. Once again it is New York and perhaps when the Mets win the 2008 World Series, this will be solidified. Just forget about the Knicks and the Rangers.

Yes we know all about what a genius Bill Bellichick is. We know Tom Brady was on the path to becoming only the third quarterback in NFL history to win a 4th Super Bowl ring. We know the Patriots entered this game on the tide of victories which had been unprecedented in NFL history. We know nobody was supposed to be able to beat the Patriots and certainly not the Giants. Just because they played the Patriots tight in the season finale didn't mean they weren't going to have Brady and Moss nightmares all afternoon. The pros installed the Pats as 12 point favourites, after all. To hell with the Giants' impressive post-season run, the Patriots were the team of destiny.

You've got to wonder after this victory whose stock rose faster and higher, Eli Manning or Giant defensive coordinator Steve Spagnuolo, who did what no other defensive guru could do: shut down to Pats. Of course it wasn't just Spagnuolo but the entirety of a brave Giant defence, an overwhelmingly perfect job by the line to do exactly what every knew had to be done to beat the Pats and that was, make Tom Brady's life hell and proving that not even Brady can complete passes on his back.


Not likely to top that catch in the rest of his career...

And Eli, well hell, all he did was lead perhaps the second or third most compelling last minute-game-winning drive in Super Bowl history. All he did was some insane sort of Houdini elusion from thirsty New England defenders to make that crazy Ally-Oop pass that David Tyree somehow, magically caught with his hands against his helmet, Lynn Swannish in all of its absurd beauty. And all he did in the last three games was beat Tony Romo, Brett Favre and Brady, all away from Giants Stadium. The new folk hero of Manhattan even if like me, you're not even a Giant fan.

Of course Brady and the Patriots didn't go down without a whimper. He led an 80 yard scoring drive which culminated with a touchdown pass to Moss and gave what many believed would the the lead the Pats would not relinquish (before Manning's own tight heroics) but even then, with only seconds left ticking, Brady unleashed what might very well have been the pass which could have put the Pats in FG tying position were it not for a last second tip by the Giant defender.

And let's not forget Plaxico Burress, scorned by many for his bold prediction which proved not only nearly spot on but which he helped fulfill with a game winning touchdown catch. Well done indeed.

There Will Be No 18-1


How many secret video tapes
does a Super Bowl Champion make?

There is no alternative to the perfect season.

You do not win 18 games in a row in one magical, perfect season only to lose the last one of all. Not when the best coach in the sport has two weeks to prepare.

Final Score

New England 41 NY Giants 23

The number one reason why the Giants will lose:

Two week layoff loses momentum.

Of course, there are others who will try and lead you astray

XLII reasons.

Who Will Be Super Bound on Championship Sunday?


Something to bear in mind: in games in which the NFL's final four had a 100-yard rusher, the Giants (6-0), Packers (5-0), Patriots (5-0) and Chargers (6-1) won 95 percent of the time.

Also bear in mind both of these matchups are repeats of Week 2 and both of the underdogs this weekend were blown out in Week 2.

San Diego @ New England


Flying Nowhere Fast...

You want a challenge? Try and figure out how the Chargers have a chance to win this game.

First of all, the odds of the Chargers gimping their way two weeks in a row to shocking upsets? Forget about the injuries to their starting QB, their star running back and their All-Pro tight end and think about the fact that the Pats are 13-2 in the post season since Coach Happy Face Belichick took over, 7-0 in the postseason at home and of course, 17-0 so far this season.

That isn't to say just because nobody's beaten the Pats yet since the preseason that the Chargers are incapable of winning this game. It just makes it bloody improbable.

But oh, it's the turnovers the Chargers are so famed at, it's the turnovers giving them an advantage, a prayer...blabla...The Patriots turned the ball over just 15 times this season, a franchise record and the fifth-lowest total in league history. So much for that game plan and prayer.

Yeah yeah, the Chargers are hot leading up to this game not having lost since Thanksgiving but what's hotter than an undefeated season? And besides, even if the weather is frigid, hot in the cold, since 1993 New England is 22-3 (including playoffs) when the kickoff temperature is 34 degrees or less.

About the only teeny tiny thing that the Chargers might like to think in their favour is the controversy surrounding the extortion in an alleged assault and battery case against Randy Moss and the distraction it causes. Distraction? Does it really seem possible that the Pats are capable under Belichick, this season, being distracted?

They might also rest their hats on the fact that a Chargers victory would likely be the biggest upset in AFC Championship history. After all, who would have bet on them beating the defending World Champions minus their three offensive stars?

But let's be real. The Pats are not the Colts. Brady is not Manning and the Chargers are not going to be catching anyone off guard.

QB Philip Rivers has two gimpy knees and is presumed to be the starter. Stupid move. If you want to give Rivers some playoff time, give it to him only if Volek can't handle it. Otherwise you stand the chance of a gimpy and immobile Rivers getting stuffed, panicking, fumbling, throwing interceptions and letting the game get away from them early and permanently. Let's not forget, gimpy or not, Rivers doesn't have any AFC Championship experience.

Not only that but Billy Volek once had two consecutive 400-yard passing games while subbing for Steve McNair in Tennessee.

Somebody is going to have to use those Charger receivers to expose the Patriots less-than-impressive secondary but if the Chargers fall behind early the game will get out of hand very quickly.

Forget about the upsets. If you're a Chargers fan your best bet is to pick them with the points and hope the game isn't overturned too quickly.


Who's your hero, baby?

Believe me, I'd like to be that crazy guy (no, not THAT one shirtless at Lambeau tonight) who says oh, I've just got this feeling that the Chargers will pull out another surprise and oh, no team has ever gone 18-0 in history and what about the last time the Chargers ventured into Gillette Stadium with a historic Patriots winning streak on the line? They beat the two-time defending Super Bowl champions to a pulp, 41-17, in Week 4 of the 2005 regular season. New England entered that game having won a franchise-record 21 consecutive home games dating to Week 17 of 2002 but...

Just for fun, I had a read through the San Diego papers. I mean what's it like to have to write for a sports page about a game your team has been told by the entire country they have absolutely zero chance winning.

Patriots
Are Perfect But Not Unbeatable

Oh?


Prediction: Patriots 24 Chargers 13

******

NY Giants @ Green Bay BRRRR



They just won't shut up about the cold for this game, will they?

First of all why the hell are they playing this game at night? Won't it be cold enough even at mid-day?

Think they'll be making snow angels on the sidelines this game or will their teeth be chattering so hard they won't be able to move? Mark Schlereth, a former lineman who's undergone more than a dozen surgeries in his career describes stepping out of the tunnel onto Lambeau Field under these conditions as "being punched in the face."

Now you can just see old notoriously bad in the cold Eli Manning playing a big psyche job on the Packers like even though historically he sucks in cold weather, up until a few weeks ago when he "found himself", "turned the corner" he sucked generally as a QB anyway, this new Eli is in fact, quite capable in the cold and fools them all.

According to Elias Sports Bureau, via a column by Filip Bondy of the New York Daily News, Manning has played in only six games where the temperature was 39 degrees or less, and only one game where it was 29 degrees or less. He has four touchdown passes, seven interceptions and a passer rating of less than 60 points in those games.

On the other hand maybe he'll only have to throw 20 passes all game and simply hand it off to Brandon Jacobs, who at |6-foot-4, 265 pounds is the biggest back the Packers have faced all season.


Super Zoom Zoom?

That's maybe something you're dreaming about if you're dreaming about a Giant upset. Especially as it keeps your mind out of those nightmares wherein Favre picks apart the Giants' continuously depleted secondary or former Giant Ryan Grant running rampant past the Giants front line who won't get good enough footing on the icy pitch to mount any kind of rush or trouble for Favre. You might see a performance by Favre
somewhat similar to the ease with which Brady turned out the Jags last weekend. But no, because Favre is generally not as patient as Brady and you'll not be surprised to see him throwing a pick or two, even against the depleted secondary.

That plus the fact that the Giants will likely blitz the hell out of him every time the need arises.

On the opposite end of the spectrum from Manning,
Brett Favre is 43-5 in home games when the temperature is 34 degrees or less.

But here are the things: the cold will sufficiently negate the passing attack of the Pack and even if it didn't the Giants will come at Favre hard, from all directions and force him into Favre-like mistakes. Grant was once dumped by the Giants and his mincing running will not be suited to a cold, icy pitch whereas the Giant combo of Jacobs and Bradshaw will combined for over 150 yards rushing. Manning will be managed appropriately so that he won't have the opportunity to make Favre-like mistakes.



Bottom line is I'd much rather see a rematch of the Pats-Giants final regular season game than listening to Favre accolades for the next two weeks.

Prediction: Giants 24 Packers 16

SEMI SUPER WEEKEND ENDS WITH A FEW LESS OF THE USUAL SUSPECTS

Should we be thankful not to see the predictable league finales, the Godzillas v the Mothras and instead watch the King Kongs v The Faye Wrays? Or should we bemoan the lack of the Super marquee but predictable matchups, the #1's v #2's, the Pats/Colts and Giants/Packers?

For one, the two QBs more famed for their performances on the field rather than the advertising market will be there. Brett Favre and Tom Brady are still potential Super Bowl opponents and they are by lengths, the most accomplished QBs remaining and frankly, would have been even if the Colts had been able to beat the Chargers.

And whilst many are certainly sick of Peyton Manning and have been for years and there still we be a Manning present, at least it is the New York media's favourite whipping boy this time around, the Manning who appears to have finally turned the corner, the Manning who is infinately less annoying and is certainly easier to root for.



On Saturday we had the Snow Bowl after all, after hearing all week the weather was not going to be a factor confined to a "few flurries". Surprise. Not only did the Packers fall behind quickly (14-0 after 4 minutes quickly) due primarily to a few fumbles by the man who would later become their hero in Ryan Grant but with the homefield snow falling at a near-blizzard rate, the Pack proceeded to score on their next 6 possessions, pulling away once and for all, leaving the Seahawks and Mike Holgrem in the snow, 42-20 as Grant redeemed himself with three touchdowns and 201 yards rushing.

Several records fell along the way but perhaps most interesting was that Favre joined Joe Montana as the only QB to throw for over 5000 post-season yards. A few of those yards came on that crazy underhanded toss for a first down that Favre made - an ill-advised toss for nearly anyone but Favre who wins ugly as he wins often.

Among the rants and raves:

"Patrick Kerney was billed as the next big thing as far as NFL defensive linemen are concerned. Kerney, one of the league's leading sackers this season, was invisible, and it wasn't because he was wearing a white jersey in a snowstorm. Mark Tauscher and the Packers' offense silenced the overhyped Kerney."

Failing, quietly in the snow...

*****

The other Saturday game featured the fearsome and fearless and undefeated Patriots of New England and, as they have in every other game they've played this season outside of the exhibition season, the Pats won and as usual they won with a fair amount of ease.


Captain Perfect Leads the Charge

Now as formidable a named QB as Favre, Pats QB Tom Brady was offered a wide open field of short passes by the Jacksonville defence who double and triple teamed Randy Moss and dared anyone else to beat them.

They didn't need to ask Brady twice to dink them to death.

"It was a dump-down game," Jaguars rookie safety Reggie Nelson sniffed. "Anybody can go 26-of-28 in a dump-down game."

Nearly perfect on the short pass, Brady completed 26 of 28 passes for 262 yards and three touchdowns and one of those incompletions was a dropped pass. He went 12 for 12 in the first half for 120 yards. His 92.9 completion percentage was an NFL record in the playoffs and regular season but perhaps more impressive that he's improved his post-season record to 13-2.

Of course the game wasn't all Brady. The Pats remained perfect as a team this season bar the two losses in the preseason (to Tennessee 27-24 on 17 August and to Tampa Bay 13-10 the week before that) and the defence, led by Rodney Harrison's late-game preserving interception was stout enough to hold off the Jaguars' final charges. Perhaps most surprising was Lawrence Maroney's 122 yards rushing which in fact outgained the vaunted rushing attack of the Jags all by himself.

Was the game actually closer than the 31-20 would suggest?

Well, consider that despite near-perfection, the Pats only outgained the Jags by 53 yards all game, they held the ball less than five minutes longer than the Jags and the game was in fact, tied at the half. The biggest difference might well have been two turnovers by the Jags, none by the Pats. The Pats were actually penalised more than the Jags, an appalling 74 yards in penalties which coach BB will certainly rage about all week in preparation of the injury-depleted Chargers.

Sunday's Upsets

In a sense, it was Sunday that saved us from the predictable. History shows that there are oftentimes upsets against the homefield favourites at this stage of the playoffs and 2008 was no different.

It might have appeared shocking that the Mighty Colts, defending champs and home of the explosive offence would have lost their final game in the Ugly Dome. But consider that this isn't even the best offence in the NFL anymore, not by a long shot, and that the defence has been decimated by the loss of a pair of key players maybe not so suprising.

Then again, if you said the Chargers would lose, on top of their All-World tight end their All-World running back and their starting quarterback you'd certainly not have given the Chargers much of a shake.

You might have even thought that given a few dodgy calls by the refs in the Colts favour in the first half which drove the normally placid Norv Turner into sideline rages, this was not a game the Colts would lose.



For one, the subs filling in for LT and Philip Rivers performed admirably. Michael Turner finished with 71 yards and a better yard-per-carry average than LT and even Billy Volek managed to lead the final drive and score the winning touchdown.

I mean what were the odds of that happening, Chargers losing essentially all of their key offensive players yet still scoring 4 TDS? For one, Rivers didn't miss the entire game and whilst he was playing he was playing admirably, perhaps even over his head, given the time the failing Colts pass rush was giving him to throw.

On the other hand you could point out that the Chargers would appear to be Peyton Manning's new achilles heel, having lost to them three straight times now and having thrown 10 interceptions in those three games.

Of course in winning their 8th straight game the Chargers proved they are no flukes. Yes, they started the season slowly, ridiculously, hopelessly even but since that slow start they've rolled and that roll has been led by a defence that does the important thing: turnovers. Two Manning interceptions killed deep scoring threats and were key moments in the game. They didn't always stop Manning but they made it count when they did - even though the Colts lost only 6 fumbles all season, the cough-up by Harrison who was stripped on his first catch of the day and remained silent thereafter.

And perhaps most importantly, when it counted, the Colts vaunted offence was not better than the Colts defence and in the end, the 28-24 victory, narrow as it was, was well-deserved. One only wonders whether or not the Chargers deserve facing the 17-0 Patriots next.

*****

And of course whilst one Manning brother was losing in an upset another was winning in an upset.

You can't accurately call the Giants victory over the Cowboys an upset. Sure, the Cowboys had the best record in the NFC and were playing at home but the weeks leading up to this moment had been tinged by poor and perhaps even worrying performance, particularly by Tony Romo, who did himself no favours with a highly publicised jaunt to a Mexican resort with Jessica Simpson when many QBs, either Manning for instance, would have been spending the off week studying the defences of potential opponents.

On the other hand, Jessica Simpson is a nice distraction from the rigeurs of an NFL season and Romo, despite all the negative publicity, was not the sole cause of the Cowboys' downfall.

For one, as he has now for several weeks on the trot, making the league wonder if perhaps he hasn't turned the proverbial corner and is now ready to take over the reigns as Top Manning, Eli Manning had a flawless game in leading the Giants.

In particular, the inspirational and rapid touchdown just before the end of the first half when most of the world was ready to believe that the demoralising and incredibly time-consuming march, led by Romo, to a Cowboys touchdown with under two minutes remaining in the half was going to cook the Giants' goose, proved instead to be the turning point of the game after all.

Sure the Giants still had to win it but standing back up after the Cowboys thought they'd given the Giants their final fateful kicking of the season just before the end of the half was a sign from the Football Gods that this game, like the one that preceded it, was not going to play out based on predictive methods.

And perhaps even more exciting than younger Manning's coming of age or the Cowboys losing was the creepy post-game tears shed by Terrell Owens who is clearly mixing and abusing his medications again.

Owens, laughably, argued that he'd "always had his QB's back" which might come as a surprise to people like Jeff Garcia and Donovan McNabb, the other two QBs he's played with, both of whom he viciously stabbed in the back.

So with the Cowboys out there's really nothing left in the NFC to hate any more. Unless of course you don't fancy spending the two weeks leading up to the Stupor Bowl listening to how fantastic Brett Favre is or what a great fairytale it would be to see him win it all after all he's been through. Another redemption of a lost career, etc. etc.

Best pray for a Giants-Pats rematch if you're looking for excitement.

So, the cat's out of the bag.



My bold Redskins 26-24 victory over the Seahawks prediction in the Wild Card Weekend was never meant to be. The momentum of 4 victories on the trot, the inspiration of the dead teammate, the legendary coach leading them, all alot of blablabla in the face of the Seahawks flashing their invincibility at home around like 100 dollah bills at a car wash full of pimps.

Instead, a 35-14 pasting and the end of the season for the nation's capital.

But not before that brief, dramatic turnaround in the 4th quarter that showed at least that they weren't going down without a fight. Well, not until Scott Suisham choked that kicked that would have maintained the momentum the Skins had ripped from the unsuspecting arms of the Seahawks.



And next week the Seahawks won't have the homefield advantage on their side.

They will be in Green Bay.

Some insiders fancy Seattle of all the NFC teams to make it to the Super Bowl and whilst the chance of Destructo Favre showing up instead of Super Favre is always a possibility, the Pack won't fold so soon. Green Bay 30 Seattle 20.

*****

Jax 22 Pittsburgh 16

This ended up looking a little better for Sports Amnesia's crack betting crew which lost on one match but won on the other.

There was never really any doubt that Jacksonville, having dismantled Pittsburgh already this season, would prove unable to do so again, especially in light of Steeler wounds.

And up to the 4th quarter that proved to be right but just like in Seattle, the losing team did not go down without a fight and it wasn't until a demoralising holding penalty on a 2-point play that would have cut the Steelers' deficit from 5 points to 3, that the game began to turn again.

Still, without that failed 2-point conversion the Jags would have had to have done more than kick a wobbling field goal to win and the smart money now says that their first playoff win since 2000 will be their only playoff win of 2008.

SUNDAY

NYG @ Tampa Bay

Eli "Bad Decisions Under Pressure" Manning zero post season wins. Jeff Garcia, two post-season wins against the Giants in two tries.

Gruden's decision to rest starters the final two weeks of the season means there's a chance they'll lose the crucial battle between each other's run offence v run defence. So long as the Giants can run Eli will not choke as badly as he has often choked in the past. Giants 31 Bucs 23

Tenn @ San Diego

Last year's wunderkinds did the predictable Schottenheimer Shuffle out of the playoffs and began this season under the guidance of Coach Turner as though they were ready to fold an entire season into one neat little compartment of failure.

They haven't won a playoff since 1994 and although they did beat these Titans on the road already this season, QB Rivers has not yet proven he can handle the post-season pressure. On the other hand Vince Young appears to thrive in the spotlight.

The Chargers have momentum and home field advantage.

Final Score: San Diego 23 Tennessee 21

If He Managed To Lose, He Can Manage To Get Lost

I'm sick of the "He didn't pitch like crap in the most important game of the season, he didn't fail to hit when it counted" excuse.

I'm tarred of hearing that one.

That's like saying guns don't ki11 people, people do.

If the manager is blameless than why is he even there?

Why not just let the players write their own lineup cards, set their own starting rotations, nominate themselves to pitch out of the bullpen. Why not hire a different 16 year old kid from Flushing to manage the team every month?

Don't tell me Willie Randolph is blameless.

Clint Hurdle is blameless and his team won rather than lost 14 of their last 15. That's with Kaz Matsui leading off and playing second base.

The manager's job is to keep teams from unraveling just like the Mets did.

If Willie isn't to blame for this, if the players are, then get rid of them all and let Willie manage a team of eager Triple A mishaps to the World Championship.


What was Willie's worst season? 1981 and 1988 he hit .232 and .230 respectively and after both seasons, he came back to hit .282 and .280 respectively. Not career highs, but indicative of an ability to bounce back. And he better bounce back HIGH.

How ironic: Kaz Matsui and Jorge Julio are in the postseason but the Mets aren't?

Top 5 Eligible Managers

1. Bobby V (for Vindication)
2 Joe Girardi
3 Buck Showalter
4 Frank Kremblas
5 Orel Hershiser
6 Lee Mazzilli

NFL WEEK 3 NOTES

what we need dont' need to know but is painfully obvious.
pats wrecking ball
colts and steelers a distant 2nd.

At the moment, no competition which means of course no such thing.

What a turnaround - will the Skins failure to score and the Giants ability to stop the Skins from scoring prove the turning point for both teams this season?

How long will the last hurrah of Brett Favre last? Only a few weeks ago he was washed-up in most minds, nearly a laughingstock. Now he leads the 3-0 Pack on a revival tour.

Gutsiest performance for a New York QB? Tough call. Eli had to come back time and time again, Chad cracked through injuries to overcome. Enormous pressure on both.

In light of the massive, sudden downfall of the Saints after their dreamy unprecedented success last season my nomination for flukiest flight to the top (or near the top) is the 3-0 Pack (Cowboys are probably more for real) and the other 3-0 teams belong.

Best unattributed quote of the week:

If they were a hurricane, the Pats would be a Category 5, with sustained
winds of 38 points per game.

Rutgers Student Section Tells Navy To Eff Off

"This is how you treat people who may die for this country?" Annapolis graduate and West Orange, N.J., native Bill Squires, a spectator on the sideline that night, told Di Ionno. "It was the most classless thing I've seen. … "At one point, I thought, 'We defend this country for people like this?' I wasn't embarrassed as a New Jerseyan. I was embarrassed as a human being."

NFL Week One



"We got the 'Brady sucks' thing going on after we beat 'em 38-14. Only in the Meadowlands."
-- Tom Brady, standing on the field at the Meadowlands and talking via a headset with CBS after the Patriots overwhelmed the Jets 38-14. An hour later he added, "That's why I love playing in New York."



Or perhaps it's because it's so easy to spy on them?...



Of course, Randy Moss didn't need a spy. He caught nine Tom Brady passes for 183 yards and a touchdown.

Hard for the Patriots not to go overboard now?

“Tom Brady and Randy Moss looked a little like Larry Bird and Bill Walton in that magical winter of 1985-86: two of the best players of all-time, plotting together for the first time, beating the stuffing out of the other team.”

So are the Pats the team to beat or the team that cheats?

*****

Redskins wore out the Dolphins in OT

“In the end, the Redskins held the Dolphins to 66 yards rushing and running backs Portis (playing his first game since late last season) and Ladell Betts combined for 157 yards rushing. But the most important fact was how the Miami defensive players felt at the end of the game. Despite training in sweltering conditions in South Florida, the Dolphins struck the Redskins as tired. A point of emphasis for this Washington team in the offseason had been trying to wear opponents down at the end of games. Yesterday it worked.”

Oddly enough considering their return to the auld three yards and a cloud of dust mentality at Redskins Park was the announcement that they've signed Reche Caldwell who was released by New England last week after playing just one season with the Patriots and leading the team in receptions.

*****


Granted, it was only the Browns, but Steelers fans must feel good about Mike Tomlin’s debut and whilst no one was ready to compare them to the Pirates, there were indeed questions going in.

"Great starts are always great, but they can't define us," Tomlin said shortly after his players gave him the game ball from their manhandling of the Cleveland Browns, 34-7, to open the NFL season.

"Because the Browns played so poorly, it was difficult for anyone to define the Steelers. It looked like a college opener, Steelers vs. Cupcake State. Before the first quarter ended, the Browns had lost two turnovers, botched a punt and committed what may be an NFL record of four separate penalties on one play, if they kept track of those things.”

Quarterback Ben Roethlisberger threw four touchdown passes for the first time in his career and the same quarterback who led the NFL last season with 23 interceptions had none yesterday and finished with a healthy passer rating of 114.3. Again, just the Browns.

And perhaps similar to Pirates fans who must console themselves with the feats of the Steelers, Browns fans must bury their heads in the hope that the Indians will make it to the World Series this October to distract them until Brady Quinn gets his debut (if indeed they wait that long…)


Bye Bye Frye

There's one less QB in Cleveland standing in Quinn's way now after the Browns traded the miserable Charlie Frye. The thing I can't figure out is:

A. How in the world did the Browns manage to convince anyone, especially after that wretched performance against Pittsburgh, that Frye was worth ANYTHING, let alone a sixth-round draft pick.

B. What the hell do the Seahawks want with Charlie Frye? Are they looking for insurance against Matt Hasselbeck Disease? Trying to become the new laughingstocks of the NFC West? Woe to the Seahawks fans if Hasselbeck gets hurt. Even if Shawn Alexander looked like his 2005 version on Sunday.

According to the Elias Sports Bureau, he's the first quarterback since the NFL/AFL merger in 1970 to start his team's season opener and be traded before Week 2.

Running Backs



Chris Brown of the Titans led everyone with 19 carries for 175 yards, a 9.2 average. Against the vaunted Jax Defence. Very impressive. And perhaps weekly performances like that will take some of the pressure off the learning curve of QB Vince Young, who showed that curve is sharp at times.

The rumour is that defenses are so concerned with keeping Young from making big plays rushing to the outside, that gives Brown and LenDale White the ability to do some damage inside. See if it's a trend...



But this Adrian Peterson kid for Vikes, wow - Peterson set a team record for yards rushing by a player in his first NFL game, eclipsing D.J. Dozier's 57 set Sept. 13, 1987. He rushed for 103 and turned a short pass into a 60 yd TD.

He also became the third running back since 2000 to gain 100 yards in his NFL debut (LaDainian Tomlinson and Cadillac Williams were the first two).

*****

Yes, Tony Romo had a strong week with 345 yards and four touchdowns passes plus another rushing, but it didn't hurt having The Mouth making great catches.

Speaking of which, the first Terrell Owens of the Week Award goes to Chad Johnson for donning a gold blazer with "Future Hall of Famer, 20??"

*****

No blip on the radar following coaching change in San Diego. A year ago, league MVP LaDainian Tomlinson and star tight end Antonio Gates had 41 percent of the Chargers' offensive touches. In the Chargers’ 14-3 victory over the Chicago Bears, Turner upped that total to 63 percent (of San Diego’s 52 offensive plays, 33 were receptions or carries by them).

*****

NFL Dogs O Da Week included the Falcons and the Chiefs who lost miserably to Houston who is QB'd by Falcons former backup, Matt Shawub. Small world.

The Bills lost three other defensive starters to serious injuries: free
safety Ko Simpson (broken left ankle); cornerback Jason Webster (broken
forearm); and linebacker Coy Wire (sprained knee this doesn't even consider the tragedy that befell reserve tight end Kevin Everett - bad week one for bills, worse one for Everett.

Adding more insult to injury, Travis Henry had 139 yards rushing in his Broncos debut, playing against his former team. and of course, they lost in the last seconds on a Jason Elam FG.

In the game's final 2:13, Jay Cutler did a pretty good imitation of John Elway. He engineered a 42-yard drive, which included his seven-yard run on fourth-and-2, to Elam's winning field goal. He delivered perfect throws on slant routes to Jevon Walker, deftly managed the clock, and alertly got the offense off the field while the field-goal unit scrambled on for Elam to connect on his 42-yard attempt with one second left.

*****

What happened to Reggie Bush and Vince Young?

Meanwhile, last year's top draft pick, Houston DE Mario Williams, who had two sacks and returned a fumble for a touchdown in the 20-3 win over LOWLY Kansas City.

*****

"Not everyone needs preseason tuneups. Randy Moss, Clinton Portis,
LaDainian Tomlinson and Plaxico Burress didn't play a single down during
the preseason. Yet Moss had a monster debut for the Patriots, Portis
rushed for 98 yards and had a touchdown for the Redskins, L.T. passed
and rushed for TDs and Burress scored a career-high three TDs."

via USA Today

*****

Something To Consider, Post Season...

Before three of his last five starts, the Sox gave Matsuzaka an extra day's rest, but his ERA in that span was 9.57 (28 ER in 26 1/3 innings). He's been giving up home runs in bunches lately, six in his last four starts spanning just 20 1/3 innings. He also has walked 11 in the last four starts.

Misc


ND, the start of a very long seasonIn two games, the Irish have a total of minus-8 rushing yards.

Premiership Week 1

1. Think Sven didn't spend all of Saturday night and most of Sunday chuckling to himself about how he had all those silly English fooled into thinking he was a crap manager when all the while he was plotting his revenge with a bunch of foreigners to take the league by storm? Well, I reckon he was laughing until he watched Man U manage only a draw against Reading (not to mention the collective shrie around fantasy football land when Rooney went down,)and realised who next week's opponent is. The side story to the convincing Man City victory over West Ham was the question of whether West Ham aren't snakebitten now with all the bad karma created by escaping the farcical Tevez escapade with their Premiership membership intact. Of course Rooney's hairline fracture is perfecting timing in the continuing Saga of Tevez.

2. Another last laugh aware must go to Sam Allardyce returning to Bolton with his new team after all the shitty things that were said about him in the week's build-up to the return match first week into the season. It's a bit mad of the schedule makers to put Sam in the frying pan in week one but perhaps they knew all along this one was going to be a larf and wanted to give Sam a little time to relax before the pressure seriously kicks in. And frankly, how bloody high do you think expectations are now that Newcastle looked so, well, capable for the first half of Saturday's game? Villa, watch out.

3. Steven Gerrard, for shame. This proves Liverpool are serious about the Premiership title. Why else would its local hero resort to such Italian tactics to get a free kick? Well, point is he hit it and hit it beautifully, which sort of makes up for it all anyway. And that's three points already. When was the last time you remember Pool taking three on opening day? Again, pity Villa, hopefully O'Neill will not be this season's hard-luck manager.

4. Was the victory by Keano's Lads over Tottenham quite as shocking as people made it out to be? After all, aren't the Spurs historically the underachievingest lot in the whole of the Premiership? Who else could spend a cool £40 million on new players and see only one of them make the starting 11 - (and that one was only there because Ledley King couldn't be...) I've always liked Martin Jol but the gravy train has derailed and embarassments, humiliations, out-right out-performed and disgraces like this Saturday's against Sunderland only serve to underscore the miserable plight of Spurs fans. Forget it, lads. That talk of breaking into the top four is fantasy.

5. As for the league's Top Two on Sunday, well, don't count yourselves the victors just yet. Against Reading the ruddy-faced Scotsman was outsmarted, whingeing bitterly after the match that Reading packed the middle and didn't really play football. It's something you hear top managers complain about all the time, Stand still whilst I try to punch you!...

And the loss of Rooney is symbolic - Man U had it their way all season last season on the way to the top. No major injuries, no recurring nightmares and few hiccups along the way bar an embarassment in the Champions League against a certain Italian side that exposed their midfield embarassments and the snooze of an FA Cup tie against Chelsea. This season, different story. Rooney's injury however hurts Steve McClaren and England's chances more than it does Manchester United because there is no Carlos Tevez warming up on the side for England. Just the likes of a benched Jermaine Defoe or perhaps the unsophisticated youth of Theo Walcott to step in. Still, there's plenty more where that came from for Man U so let's not start crying for them just yet.

Chelsea on the otherhand, came out swinging - perhaps out of necessity given Birmingham's shocking early goal. Encouraging to see that Mourinho's pledge for more exciting football was not lip service. Exciting to see this kind of 3-2 football so rare in the chess-like tactics of the top teams. Of course, exposed in the attack was a rotten defence, particularly the right back, Glen Johnson, who sucks just as bad as he did the first time around with Chelsea, a few pretty games with P'mouth last season notwithstanding. But good on B'ham City to show some spunk on the road and to demonstrate that perhaps they are not destined for relegation just yet.

TOP EIGHT, Week One

1. Chelsea, 3 points
2. Liverpool, 3 points
3. Manchester United, 1 point
4. Arsenal, 3 points
5. Newcastle, 3 points
6. Everton, 3 points
7. Blackburn, 3 points
8. Man City, 3 points (go on, secretly we are all rooting for a Svennis comeback and to hear all the barmy bastids wish aloud Steve McClaren had never arrived...)

My All-Star Ballot v. Reality

Quite naturally, having lent hours of scholarly study to the task of selecting my starting 8 for the National and American League All-Star squads, I was quite curious to see how those starting selections fared in the face of reality.

AMERICAN LEAGUE (Sports Amnesia selections first)

First Base: Justin Morneau, MIN v David Ortiz, BSN. Reality reeks of sentimentality and past actions. Not only does Morneau (.280-20-61) have the stats that Ortiz doesn't (.311-13-49) - he's also a first baseman rather than a glorified DH and yes, I know there's no DH this season but does that justify sticking Ortiz in over the Kid who is outhitting and out first baseman'ing him? Not. Point for Sports Amnesia 1, Reality 0.

Second Base: Brian Roberts, BAL (.321-5-25) v Placido Polanco, DET(.331-2-36). Ok, mebbe this is a toss-up but Roberts has 26 stolen bases compared to Polanco's 3. OBP .405 to Polanco's .378. It's close but Sports Amnesia is correct again, 2-0.

Third Base: A-Rod, NYY, mutual choice, no-brainer.

Shortstop: Derek Jeter, NYY. Yes, it pains me to pick to Yankees to start the infield but really, there isn't much to argue in anyone else's favour here.

Catcher: Victor Martinez, CLE v Ivan Rodriguez, DET. Ok, now a 14-time All-Star but are you voting via somnambulism or merit? I-Rod is hitting (.279-8-44) and his cannon arm is ageing. Martinez, on the other hand, (.324-14-63) the heart and guts of his team, like I-Rod was before he started ageing. And I know this isn't supposed to matter but last I looked, the Indians were ahead of the Tigers in the standings. Not being a sentamentalist, it's clear that Sports Amnesia once again, have chosen with the mind rather than the heart. SA 3, Reality 0.

Outfielders: Sports Amnesia selected the trio of Vladimir Guerrero, LAA, Torii Hunter, MIN and Ichiro Suzuki, SEA. Reality selected the trio of Guerrero, Suzuki and Magglio Ordonez. Magglio Ordonez is hitting (.369-13-68) and has wild hair. Sports Amnesia's selection, Torii Hunter, (.296-17-63) - you could almost say a toss-up because Magg's numbers are bigger even if he's a big, fat slow bastid in the field compared to Hunter's six consecutive Gold Gloves. Sports Amnesia 4, Reality NIL.

NATIONAL LEAGUE

First Base: Prince Fielder, MIL. Sensibly, agreed. A no brainer.

Second Base: Kaz Matsui, COL v. Chase Utley, PHI. Admittedly, this selection came simply because as a Met fan, Kaz having disappointed during his Met career and now rejuvinated in the high airs of Coors Field, is the sensible pick when the best choice out there stat-wise is a Philly. You see, Sports Amnesia don't vote for no stinkin' Phillies nor stinkin' Braves so in this case, reality is justified. Sports Amnesia 4, Reality 1.

Third Base: David Wright, METS. Ok. Reality shows common sense.

Shortstop: Jose Reyes, METS. Right. See above. Nobody better.

Catcher: Paul Lo Duca, METS v Russell Martin, LAD. C'mon. Russell Martin? What the fuck, am I on candid camera? What has this punk ever done? (.306-9-55). Arm? Ability to manage a pitching staff? Sixteen stolen bases for a catcher? And you tell me Lo Duca isn't even on the effin reserves? Right, Brian McCann made the squad simply because the Braves needed a token chimp who wasn't a pitcher on their squad? Alright, maybe Sports Amnesia was pickin' with the gut, for the guts of a catcher, a man's man. But still, Russell Martin? C'mon, kids. Sports Amnesia 4, Reality 2.

Outfielders: Ken Griffey Jr., CIN, Corey Hart, MIL and Matt Holliday, COL v. Carlos Beltran METS, Barry Bonds SF and Ken Griffey Jr.
Admittedly, Bonds is unavoidable considering that despite the chase and the controversy and the mad hatred that follows him like a cloud of dirt followed Pig Pen, he's put up decent numbers. And seeing as how the game is being played in SF, well I guess you can't really argue against it. And yes, I find myself in the funny position arguing against a Met but Carlos, meboy, you just haven't cut it this season yet. We've been waiting for the outburst of outbursts to sending you screeching forth into the skies of Superstardom but so far, mate, well, you're just expensive. Reality wins on Bonds but not on Beltran.

FINAL SCORE: Sports Amnesia 5, Reality 3.

Next year, scabs, consult with the oracle before selecting your teams.
Write-in:

Sosa's 600


Before, 1989


600 homers after...

Congrats to Sammy Sosa for the questionably-achieved 600th homer, making him only the 5th in baseball history to do so.

He now joins Barry Bonds on the Dodgy 600 list.

Babe Ruth, Hank Aaron and Willie Mays remain on the 600-By-Human-Strength-Alone list.

Ironically, Sosa's 600th came against his former team, the Chicago Cubs, for whom he'd hit all but 55 of those homers.

*****

Foot-In-Mouth is headed for the DL even though his MRI was negative.

Seems that near no-no may have been the final straw, pushing too hard. Schilling nearly pitched a no-hitter at Oakland on June 7, giving up a two-out single to Shannon Stewart in the ninth inning. But he allowed 11 earned runs and 19 hits in 9 1-3 innings in his next two starts.

*****


less theatrical congrats...

Dave Trembley won his first game ever in the Bigs last night, as the O's snapped a 9-game losing streak, beating the Padres

What have we missed in the interim of this season?

Most excitingly, two no-hitters.



The first came in mid-April a no-hitter by the White Sox's Mark Buehrle. Buehrle threw the first no-hitter of his career, as well as the first by a Sox pitcher since Wilson Alvarez accomplished the feat on Aug. 11, 1991, as the South Siders beat Texas 6-0 in front of 25,390 at U.S. Cellular Field.

It was also the 16th no-hitter in franchise history, and the first one thrown at home since Joel Horlen did it Sept. 10, 1967, against Detroit.



Coincidentally, the second was tossed by Justin Verlander of the Tigers, the first no-hitter for the Tigers since Jack Morris in 1984 and was the first to do it in the Motor City in more than a half-century.

In between we have had a premature call of the demise of the Yankees who have now won five straight series' (compared to the Mets who started fast and have now lost five straight series'...)

We have had two steroid stars in the news over and over again.

1. Jason Giambi, the disgraced Yankee is now under pressure to spill the beans. Used car salesman and baseball czar Bud Selig said June 6 that he wanted Giambi to meet with "special investigator" George Mitchell within two weeks and to cooperate fully with the steroids investigation. Selig threatened to discipline the New York Yankees designated hitter following published remarks by Giambi that seemed to be an admission of steroids use. Selig said he would take Giambi's cooperation with Mitchell into account in determining discipline.

Selig's threats of course, are empty.

Nick Canepa, of the San Diego Tribune knows the scoop:

"Commish Bud will use his “best interests of baseball” powers to do this, but we know it won't end with the player going quietly. If a suspension comes, the union will fight it and an arbitrator eventually will decide it.

Selig wants Giambi so he can tell Congress: “See, I've caught one. We're doing something.” That much I can see. He wants the politicians off baseball's back, and I'm all for that. Lawmakers should worry about the business of America, not what ballplayers put into their bodies. Congressfolk should try cleaning up their own houses before going after someone else's."

2. And then on the other side of the coast there's the ho-hum historic chase of Hank Aaron's Homerun record.



He was most recently in Boston where Nick Cafardo had his say:

"Bonds's pursuit of Hank Aaron's home run record has often been joyless. He hit his 748th against Tim Wakefield in the sixth inning yesterday, his first at Fenway Park, and even though the Red Sox swept the weekend series, you could tell Bonds enjoyed his time here."

*****

Now we've had our first sacking of the season when the O's Sacked Sam Perlozzo.

Can you blame them, really?

Eight lossess in a row, including three at home to the rival Nationals and you can expect as much. Question is, with a 29-40 record in the impregnable AL East, what difference does it really make? Will anyone in particular make the O's more exciting if they aren't moving any higher than third and have no hope for the playoffs no matter how hot they get under new management?

No Comment

Pee Your Pants For the Brewers?

Oh, they sure know how to bring class to baseball, those Brewers. As of Saturday, 420 people had signed a pledge that they would pee their pants if the Brewers make the playoffs this season. Few of those pledges are of an age where such a thing might pose a problem regardless of whether or not the Brewers make the playoffs.

No shortage of press coverage on the Milwaukee Miracle, that the Brewers possess the best record in baseball...

Archie Bunker's Army, who bemoans Saturday's Mets loss to the Brewers and questions the sudden rise in the stats of JJ Hardy.

From wurst to first in Milwaukee

"The Milwaukee Brewers haven't been to the postseason since 1982. They haven't had a winning season since 1992.
The Brewers' identity in recent years has centered on two sideshows - their wisecracking broadcaster, Bob Uecker, and the ever popular sixth-inning sausage race at home games.

Usually in Milwaukee, the sausage-race standings are a lot more compelling than the National League Central standings.

Not this year."

and

Right Mix of Ingredients:

"They are so surprising and so much fun to watch that they inspired a Wisconsin fan to start a website called PeeYourPantsForTheBrewers.com. The 24-year-old fan, known only as "Bernie," is taking pledges from fans to do as the website's name suggests if the team makes the playoffs."

*****


Does this look like Schilling In Shape?

Coming off a 6-1 road trip in which their five starters, Schilling, Josh Beckett, Daisuke Matsuzaka, Julian Tavarez and Tim Wakefield had a combined ERA of 1.55, the Red Sox have the second-best road record in baseball at 14-6 (behind the Mets' 14-5). Going into Friday's games, their starters, at 20-9, had the most wins of any rotation in baseball and their bullpen, had the second-lowest ERA (2.38) with 13 saves in 14 chances.

By the way, my prediction on Roger Clemens' season with the Yankees: 9-4 4.17 ERA.


*****

BOOK EXCERPT: "The Real All Americans" By Sally Jenkins


With Jim Thorpe, right, taking pitches out of the single-wing offense, the Carlisle Indians almost were unstoppable. (Cumberland County Historical Society Carlisle, Pa.)

Carlisle roared off to a 6-0 start. On Oct. 26, they went to Philadelphia to face unbeaten Pennsylvania, ranked fourth in the nation, at Franklin Field before a crowd of 22,800. No team all season had crossed Penn's goal line.

On just the second play of the game, Hauser whipped a 40-yard forward pass over the middle that Gardner caught on a dead run.

There are three or four signal moments in the evolution of football, and this was one of them. Imagine the excitement of the crowd that day -- and the confusion of the defenders -- if all they had ever seen was a densely packed, scrumlike game. Suddenly, the center snapped the ball three yards deep to a man who was a powerful runner, a deadeye passer and a great kicker. The play must have felt like an electric charge.

"It will be talked of often this year," the Philadelphia North American said. "No such puny little pass as Penn makes, but a lordly throw, a hurl that went farther than many a kick."

*****



Not quite as impressive as the list of those pledging to pee their pants, there is now a list of people who visited Tank Johnson in Jail. Eat your heart out...wonder what the list will be like for Paris Hilton?

*****

AGELESS PITCHING

Wednesday night saw two interesting pitching matchups of ageless wonders:



In Philadelphia, Randy Johnson vs. Jamie Moyer: At 88 years, 48 days, it was the oldest combined age of any opposing lefty starters in Major League history.

The Unit struck out the first 6 Phillies he faced prompting many to begin believing that after two miserable starts to the season, he had finally regained his National League midas touch. He finished with 9 strikeouts over 6 innings and gave up only 4 hits yet was undone by the Diamondback bullpen who surrendered 6 runs working the rest of the game after Johnson had left with a 3-0 lead and what he'd hoped was his first win of the season.

Jamie Moyer, who at 44 is the oldest pitcher in the Major Leagues until Roger Clemens makes his debut for the Yankees. wasn't nearly as flashy but slightly more resilient, lasting 7 innings to earn his 4th win of the season against only two losses.

*****




In Atlanta there was a Hall of Fame Pitcher's Duel matching the 43-year-old Greg Maddux with his 335 career victories against former Brave teammate John Smoltz for the first time since 1992. Imagine that, a duel redux, 15 years later! Smoltz, who turns 40 in less than a week, has "only" 197 wings by comparison but also 154 saves to his credit.

Like The Unit, Maddux left with the lead, after 5 1/3 innings only to see his bullpen waste the potential victory after allowing only one run on four hits. Smoltz, who improved to 5-1 this season and 3-1 lifetime against Maddux, struck out seven, walked none and held the Padres to homers by Geoff Blum, his first, in the second inning, and Adrian Gonzalez, his 10th, in the third.

"It was a special night, it lived up to its billing," Smoltz said. "I think each pitcher would have selfishly like to have beat the other 1-0 and know they pitched a great game. But he showed vintage Maddux stuff and he was able to keep us from hitting the ball when he needed to. You can see while he's still pitching."

*****


Shhhhhh

Another ageing pitcher in the news, albeit more for his mouth than his performance, was Curt Schilling, who never seems to be at a loss for putting his foot in his mouth.

The 38 year old who has 211 victories of his own and who is energetic enough not only to pitch but also write his own blog, 38 pitches, less than a week after noting the Red Sox "didn't need" Roger Clemens (true enough considering their starting rotation), went on a mild tirade about steroid homer side show Barry Bonds, noting:

"Oh yeah. I would think so. I mean, he admitted that he used steroids. I mean, there's no gray area. He admitted to cheating on his wife, cheating on his taxes, and cheating on the game, so I think the reaction around the league, the game, being what it is, in the case of what people think. Hank Aaron not being there. The commissioner trying to figure out where to be. It's sad. And I don't care that he's black, or green, or purple, or yellow, or whatever. It's unfortunate. There's good people and bad people. It's unfortunate that it's happening the way it's happening."

He later issued a rather massive and all-encompassing apology for his remarks.

Rocket To Lift Off In Pinstripes



So now they're paying their latest star pitcher $28 million in addition to coughing up $27 million for A-Rod.

Yet when considering the Red Sox paid $51 million just for the rights to the thus-far underwhelming Daisuke Matsuzaka, perhaps this money well spent.

Well, not perhaps, definately.

Given the shambles of the Yankees starting rotation it was imperative they signed Clemens. Yes, the Astros could have dearly used him as well but the Red Sox, well they seemed pretty set with their own rotation doing quite well so in essence this was probably the Yankees' signing all along.

Andy Pettitte has twice been pressed into relief action to help out a beleaguered bullpen, while Chien-Ming Wang, Mike Mussina, Jeff Karstens, Phil Hughes and Carl Pavano have all spent time on the disabled list.

But Clemens will be with the Yankees as a true Rent-An-Arm. He doesn't have to be with the team on trips he isn't scheduled to pitch on.

"We don't need him" is what Curt Schilling said of the signing. Wonder if that will come back to haunt him.

Funny enough, his debut could be 1st June when the Yankees, currently five and a half games behind, face the Red Sox at Fenway. Mark your calendars.

*****

Guess who has the best record in the National League so far this season...

Not the Mets, nor the Braves nor the Dodgers, Giants, defending champion Cardinals.

The Brewers, 21-10 not only have the best record in the NL but they are ahead of even the Clemens-less Red Sox, who at 20-10 have the best record in the AL.

Anyone have a Brewers-Red Sox World Series predicted?

Didn't think so.

*****

Just when you thought the Phillies' season couldn't get any more ridiculous given the Spring Training boasting that they were the team to beat in the East (where they currently sit in 4th with a 14-17 record, the horrific start to the season and the even more horrific start by Ryan Howard, it did get even more ridiculous when their key starting pitcher signing, Freddy Garcia, was injured by an equipment cart.

Garcia, who is 1-2 with a 6.05 ERA in four starts this year, ran into an equipment cart that had stopped along the warning track in San Francisco's ballpark.

*****

Who is going to be the NL selection for the first base All Stars? Derek Lee is hitting .414 for the suddenly resurgent Cubbies and Rockies first baseman an nearly-traded Todd Helton is hitting .394.

Both have a pair of homers to their credit and Helton has 22 RBIs, one more than Lee. Helton's OBA is .526 whilst Lee's is "only" .496.

*****

NFL Draft

As is custom, the staff are on holiday during the draft week chaos in order to ponder things of deeper meaning that tend to get lost in the earthquake of sporting news like the death of another Cardinal.

I mean, I wake up on a Monday morning, just after midnight to watch the UK broadcast of the Cards-Cubs game and instead we get what? A replay of Game 7 of the 2001 World Series. You remember that one? Schilling on the mound against Clemens, The Unit coming in to relieve. Holy shit, what a game. It's a pity Josh Hancock died but watching the replay of that game was better than any live Cardinals-Cubs broadcast, for certain.

Anyway, I've lost track of the thread here - the NFL Draft. It's one of those things that people bitch and complain about being overhyped yet seem to follow it as closely (some anyway) as the playoffs. Overrated players, unknown picks - what difference just it make just yet? Six years from now, perhaps some impact but right now? Nada.


I'm guessing Joe Thomas and Brady Quinn are not going to lead the Browns to the Super Bowl this season...

They grade the Cleveland Browns ability to take the best offensive lineman available in Joe Thomas who might, like many offensive collegiate juggernauts, prove no good in the NFL and then getting Brady Quinn who might end up being Joe Montana or equally Rick Mirer but more likely somewhere in between. I don't think it's a big deal, a change-the-franchise 'round sort of moment. It's just that the Browns have been so bad for so long, any good news seems like ecstatic news. And granted, if you're a Browns fan you're happy so I won't be pissing on your parade.


Good luck with that one, Tom Brady

But what about the Patriots picking up Randy Moss? This, on the heels of a heady offseason of free agent signings and a solid draft probably make them, with chips on their shoulders and perhaps the final season of Bellichick looming over their shoulders, early favourites to overtake the Colts one last time.

*****

Baseball

Well, the first month's in the bag.

One dead player and for most teams, 24-26 games under their belt -those teams of course that weren't snowed out.

Some suprises in the first month:

1. Yankees ending month at the bottom of the AL East with a 9-14 record.

Sure, Joe Torre is being supported, for now by the Evil Steinbrenner but if this goes on another few weeks, injuries to starters notwithstanding, how long before Joe Girardi gets the nod?

Torre, to these ears unconvincingly, says there's alot of baseball left. True enough, it might just be though that he won't be involved in it...

"I don't think the standings are an issue at this point," Torre said after Sunday's loss. "We all know we're going to start winning consistently sooner or later. Obviously, sooner is more appropriate. … We need to play better. We will. … Long-term, you know, water will seek its level."


2. Defending World Champion Cardingals ending month at the bottom of the NL Central with a 10-14 record.

You knew something was up when they were swept in the first three games of the season by the Mets, a team they'd knocked out in the NLCS to get to the World Series to begin with.

The slow start, the death to another pitcher...it's the hell to pay for last season's success, for sure. But otherwise, it's a dearth of hitting - look at the heart of the lineup - Pujols, Edmonds and Rolen hitting .250, .222 and .250 respectively.

Then you've got a starting pitcher in the form of Kip Wells stinking up the jernt. 6 starts with a 1-5 record and a 5.65 ERA. Ace starter Chris Carpenter has pitched only once this season before getting shelved on to the DL.

3. Baseball card collection fetches $1.6 million at Auction - imagine that - baseball cards making one a millionaire. Think of all those shoe boxes binned by errant mothers in all those lifetimes past...

4. You thought Sandy Koufax was finished? Not in Israel where he was drafted last week to play for one of the six inaugural teams in Israel's newly-formed professional baseball league.

Dice-K Outhurled In Fenway Debut



As a footnote on the long highway of the 2007 season this will probably not mean much or perhaps not even be long-remembered.

But for one night anyway, the hype machine of Dice-K was temporarily derailed when its spotlight was stolen by the brilliant pitching performance of Seattle's own ace hurler, Felix Hernandez.

As you may have heard, Hernandez one-hit the Red Sox in his duel against Daisuke Matsuzaka and had a no-hitter going until JD Drew singled in the 8th.

Watching the game in the pre-dawn hours of England telly I couldn't help but be amazed not by the pitching performance of a 21 year old but by how often the muppet broadcasters mentioned the no-no.

I'd always thought it was supposed to be a bit of a jinx for teammates to mention a potential no-hitter in the midst of it and yet here were these human turds with mouths clamouring for the chance to point out the obvious over and over again, jinxing everything in their midst all in the incessant battle to show, what? They already know what we already know?

You know why you don't see no-hitters on tv? Because big mouthed announcers can't shet their feckin gobs long enough about it, that's why. They don't care about watching a no-hitter, they care about talking about it and talking about it and talking about it until you're almost rooting for a goddamned hit just so they'll shut up about it already.

The Godzilla-Versus-Mothra-like battle between Matsuzaka and Seattle Mariners all-star center fielder Ichiro Suzuki nearly ground the Tokyo stock market to a halt.

If you're a Seattle fan you can wallow in the bliss knowing you didn't spend half a fortune to sign youthful ace pitcher. Hernandez in two starts this season has allowed a grand total of four hits in 17 innings.