Waiting For The Other Shoe To Drop

"I guess I hate the Yankees now," Schilling said last night following his trade to the Boston Red Sox.

It's one of those blurbs you read and think, nahh, it's just wishful thinking, vicious rumour, propaganda from Theoland. But it's true, it's official and the first shot has been fired across the bow of the 2004 season.

You might think it's too good to be true: two Yankee humiliations within a month and it isn't even Christmas yet. The humiliating shutout loss to the Marlins for the World Championship was the poke in the eye with the stick and the trade of Curt Schilling to the Red Sox for what amounts to Casey Fossum and a load of chuff is the follow-up kick to the balls. The fact that they were Steinbrenner's balls that took the blow only makes the video replay all the more delicious in slow-motion, over and over, and you must wonder what is going on in poor little Brian Cashman's mind, the repercussions of King George's wrath at the failure and humiliation of having their arch enemies sign the best player available in the off season. And make no mistake about it: Bartolo Colon and Javier Vasquez, if you look at the record books, have won zero World Series games against the Yankees and zero World Championships. They aren't going to bring the title to the Bronx and neither will Gary Sheffield.

What does the coup of Curt Schilling to Boston mean? King George twists in the wind a little longer, sputters harder, turns a deeper shade of purple and will open his little Yankee pocketbook to Overspend on the Overrated yet another season in a row. All for naught. You'd think three successive years of failure and the dismal excuse of a baseball team over in Queens would teach King George he can't buy his way to the top anymore.

I'm skeptical about the whole thing though. Same way I was skeptical about the Phillies signing Jim Thome and trading for Kevin Millwood and beating their puny little chests about what world beaters they were before they'd even had a chance to get no-hit in Spring Training. There's something a little too obvious about trading for Curt Schilling that makes me think the Red Sox are just a disaster waiting to happen.

You've still got the biggest whiner in baseball to contend with in his contract season. If Pedro were a team player, not a quitter and a loser and a choke artist and a Yankee hero, you could say that this dynamic trio, this Pedro and Schilling and Lowe, would seal the season, end the "curse", slash the misery, breath hope into the tiny lungs of Boston. But Pedro is a season-long menstrual cycle whose cramps will become more intense as the season wears on. He isn't winning material, let's face it. How many shots against the Yankees did he have last year and how many times did he fail to close the deal?

With the trade for Schilling the Red Sox have only added by one, the number of pitchers who are Yankee-killahs on the Red Sox staff. Before Boston wakes up with the smelling salts, it should remember that a staff of one does not a World Champion make.

Nevertheless, it's good to watch King George squirm in the interim.

*****

Will someone please tell me why an aging, third-rate defensive catching liability with declining offensive numbers who refuses to do what is best for the team by moving to first base and selfishly persists on a trying to forge a false legacy, is a beloved commodity? Why is trading Mike Piazza so unappealing?

Because one thing for certain, the Mets will never go anywhere with him again and if the Met ownership werent' such sentimental fools, they'd demand Piazza be traded, they'd never have signed a washout like Tom Glavine, they'd dump Al Leiter while he still has a few gallons in the tank, and they'd hire someone to go and break Fat Mo's knees, just to make sure he doesn't get any cheeky thoughts about returning to wreak havoc on the Mets once again.

In return for Piazza we should net a few good, young pitchers and a stick. I wouldn't take any pitchers from the O's. They're all damaged goods. The O's had what, like 200 draft picks over a two year period and they used 99% of them on pitchers and 90% are already on the DL or recovering from some sort of major surgery that leaves their pitching arms dangling from their shoulder sockets by a few stringy tendons. Taking O's pitchers for Piazza would be like buying a house while watching it burn down. In fact, there is very little appeal in anything Orioles-like. And frankly, what makes anyone think they could convince Piazza to sign off on a trade to a terminal organization like the Baltimore Orioles? Would you want to play for a schmuck like Peter Angelos?

Texas has no pitchers to trade and since pitching is what they most sorely need, other than the salary relief of dumping A-Rod, Texas isn't an attractive alternative.

So where does it leave us? American League team with alot of good, young pitchers: how about the Chicago White Sox? Wouldn't Mike Like Chicago, just like the other Mike did? Mike and the implausibly redeemable Frank Thomas could trade off and on between DH and the field, Mike could catch to his heart's content when Frank is bone weary and Paul Konerko feels like hitting, and frankly, when you look at the other catching possibilities, what have you got in Chicago? The 60 year old Sandy Alomar and the .234 bat of Miguel Olivo? Imagine the batting order on a good day this would produce: Thomas (42-105 .267), Piazza (31-101 .305 in a normal season), Ordonez (29-99 .317), Lee (31-119 .291), Everett (28-92 .287), the ever-declining Konerko and the up-and-coming Crede. Not to mention the heart-warming reunion with Roberto Alomar this trade would produce. So the White Sox get a sorely-needed catcher and a big bat to add the heat to opposing pitching staffs, what do the Mets get?

Let's have a Damaso Marte (4-2 1.58 11 saves) for starters. Would the Sox squawk about giving him up? Did they squawk about heaving out our future closer in the form of Royce Ring in return for the dustbin of second base malcontents, Roberto Alomar? No, they were happy about it. So while we're at it, we'll keep our designs modest, and ask for Aaron Rowand, who the Sox have no room for in the outfield, to play centerfield at Shea and maybe dip into their Minor Leagues for a Tetsu Yofu because frankly, hasn't everyone always wanted their very own Tetsu Yofu to root for in their miserable little lives? And let's point out that he went 9-8 with a 3.50 ERA in AA last year. He could be next season's D-Train waiting to happen, who knows?

So there you have it Sportsfans: Mike Piazza to the Chicago White Sox for Damaso Marte, Aaron Rowand and Tetsu Yofu.

Now, after Fat Mo's knee caps have been dealt with and Piazza's salary has been jettisoned, the next bit of business is the pitching. Let's face it, Leiter, Glavine and Trachsel aren't going to scare anyone as a starting trio. Personally, I'd like to see both Glavine and Leiter gone. I don't care about what hard workers they are or what wonderful little community helpers they are or how much class they have. They've both seen their best years, now far behind them and keeping them around just so Wilpon can play daddy-for-hire just isn't worth it. Glavine belongs on a team where he doesn't need to be the first or second starter on the staff, somewhere he can wallow in obscurity and find himself for a final burst before the end of his career. 300 wins indeed. Ha! I'd trade him to anyone who would take him for anything they'd give us. Why not the Texas Rangers? They're a gullible lot. And Al Leiter would look very happy in St Louis and here again, I don't care what we get in return, just gut the starting rotation because it won't carry the Mets anywhere but down like a lead weight next season. Gut and rebuild and keep the sappy Mr Wilpon out of the baseball business decisions.

And while I'm on it, none of this will come to pass because like complete and unrepentant idiots, the Met brain trust couldn't be arsed to offer Omar Minaya the GM job straight up. Did they really think he was going to leave the Expos to play second fiddle to a talentless headscratcher like Jim Duquette? Sweet Jesus, that was stupid. But consistent at least. Sort of like: hey, let's fire one of the best managers in baseball but KEEP a complete drooling moron like Steve Phillips as GM because he's done such a bang-up job ruining the team with his bad decisions. It's one of the reasons you learn to love to hate the Mess Mismanagement. If there is a wrong decision to be made, by god, they will find it and they will make sure that they do it.

So it's certain that Glavine and Leiter will be at the head of the rotation, even if someone had the guts to trade Piazza. Glavine and Leiter might not be bad if you threw in Sidney Ponson. Maybe Miguel Batista is still going unsigned by the D-backs despite the loss of Schilling's salary. It's almost beginning to look like a rotation. I can't be arsed about Aaron Heilman at the moment. I'm still too excited about having Tetsu Yofu. So if you can sign Ponson and Batista or some other sod, like Shawn Estes and you've still got Trachsel to kick around and you've got a bunch of promising kids still a year or two away from the rotation, it isn't looking too pathetic. Then sign the mighty righty Shigetoshi Hasegawa to compliment the lefty Damaso Marte in the bullpen. It's a start. It isn't first division material, oh no, but it isn't hey, let's watch the Single A Mets lose another gut-churner to the effin Milwaukee Brewers again, either.

Problems in centerfield? Answered by the Piazza trade when they picked up Aaron Rowand. Solid and unspectacular and cheap. No head case. Just the sort of steadiness you need. Ideally, your CF is also fast and could lead off. Can we say that about Rowand, well, with a little luck and imagination, perhaps. But he's no Roger Cedeno out there. He isn't going to get hurt by getting hit in the head with a fly ball. In fact, I'd even venture to say that he might be another Rip Repulski out there and who can quibble with that? But you've got a must or two hanging on out there and one of them is Kaz Matsui because Kaz Matsui brings the pizazz to make up for the Piazza buzz loss and if a team in New York can't have some Kaz, they just aren't going to cut it. King George wants him too and now is the time, not next week or the week after, to go all out, recruit like your franchise depended on it, romance, wine and dine, make him feel like royalty. Now that isn't an easy thing to do when you're trying to sell a dump like Shea Stadium over the history of Yankee Stadium. If the standard deal is 3 years for $21 million, go for 5 years and $45 million. Yes, it's reckless and crazy but not as reckless and crazy as it was to give a washout like Tom Glavine a fat salary for another three years when he's already been washed up for a year and a half. Take a chance, generate a buzz, get noticed. Because otherwise, he's going to be winning for someone else down the road and it will be rubbed in the noses of Met fans for the entirety of his career. He is the cornerstone of the future middle with Reyes.

So, you've done the impossible: dumped Piazza and signed Kaz away from everyone else. Whew. You still have no power to speak of. You might have Kaz leading off and Jose Reyes behind him. You might have Reyes followed by Cliff Floyd but then you've got a big hole, like a pulled tooth, in the clean up spot. Here you will need free agent help because re-signing a stiff like Tony Clark isn't going to cut it. You won't or shouldn't or can't afford Guerrero and Sheffield is a BIG misadventure waiting to happen. You have two positions open, two positions that could supply a little power combined but not alot singularly: So you sign Tampa Bay's Travis Lee (.275-19-70) for a reasonable amount and get solid defense at first base if somewhat pedestrian production at the plate. Then to make up for it, you sign Shannon Stewart to a deal. Not this Shannon Stewart, the other one. The one who will be the leadoff hitter for the Mets.

Stewart - LF
Kaz -ss
Reyes - 2b
Floyd - Lf
Ty Wigginton - 3b
Travis Lee - 1B
Rowand - CF
Jason Phillips - C

Rotation:

Glavine
Leiter
Trachsel
Ponson/Batista/Estes
Heilman

Pen

Damaso Marte (L)
Shigetoshi Hasegawa (R)
John Franco (L)
etc.