Insomnia in Warwickshire

One of the primary benefits of these bouts of insomnia in the silence of the Warwickshire countryside is that they allow me to listen via the internet to a plethera of baseball games in America that I'd have otherwise blissfully slept through.

In the instant moment for example, I've just finished listening to the Astros sweep the MLB-best Cardinals and vault themselves into the NLWC lead. Unpleasant giddiness from Astroland, I assure you. But to erase the ugliness from my mind, I've switched now to top of the 8th between the Texas Rangers and the Anaheim Angels in the battle for the AL West (and final playoff spot) where the Rangers have just taken a 6-5 lead and Angels manager Mike Soscia is arguing about an early take off from third on a sac fly that broke the tie.

Later, there will be the Giants, currently ahead of the Padres by a 2-0 margin in the 2nd inning and Oakland is at Seattle. Four games, within an hour, each of them with heavy playoff implications. This time of year is always when I think of Bob Costas' idiotic mewl against the wildcard in baseball. As it is, there are two of eight playoff spots left. Without the wildcard, we're only interested in the AL West in the last week of baseball. Well, that and Ichiro's chase. Now just three away from Sisler's ancient mark.

(Update: Rangers are leading 6-5 in the top of the 9th, with Erstad, Glaus and Guerrero to go to put themselves two games behind the Angels with four games remaining)

Sad to say, I've not bothered listening to the Mets and their triple A train in several weeks since none of them, save for a few undeserved upsets against the rapidly choking Cubs, have had any playoff implications. On the bright side, only a year too late, it appears they've finally hired Expos GM Omar Minaya. Of course, in typical Mets fashion, they haven't hired him to be their GM, they've hired him to be their "head of baseball operations" which means that the Mets now have one "official" GM in Jim Duquette, one "unnamed" GM in Jeff Wilpon and one "head of baseball operations but certainly not GM" in Minaya. Idiots. They'll need another six or seven GMs if they hope to avoid imminent disaster - the rumours are aswirl that for the second time in a row, they will be bridesmaids to Lou Piniella and will hire another LOOOOser in his stead - this time in the form of a manager with a CAREER LOSING RECORD, Jim Fregosi. Good luck to another crap series of seasons. One very damning stat in examining Fregosi's record: "In each of his four managerial stops, Fregosi left on good terms with the players." - Sounds like another recipe for disaster. If that (hiring Fregosi to manage the Mets) comes to pass, I'm going to seriously consider renouncing the Mets for something more helpful to my psychological well-being, like a lobotomy...

(Update, D'Oh! After two quick outs, Curtis Pride hits a triple to drive in Vladimir and tie the game, Francisco Cordero blows the save...6-6 going into the bottom of the 9th)

I've decided that if I'm forced to renounce the Mets for general incompetence and hostility towards success for signing a managing miscarriage like Fregosi to manage them into fourth place every season, then I'll probably have to root for a team that at least tries every year, despite the absurd odds pitted against them; yes, Les Expos.

Washington Johnsons?

Of course, I could never abandon my Mets for another band of pathetic yelpers, but it will certainly be an interesting story as baseball returns to Washington.

Although they couldn't possibly become the Washington Expos, I wouldn't think anyway that not even Selig is THAT stupid, I've not heard much about what they will be called. According to the Washington Times, a petition was circulated to name the team the "Washington Grays" in tribute to the Homestead Grays, a Negro League team that played in Washington in the 1930s and 1940s. "The Senators" seems rather stupid since despite their best efforts, DC has no representation in the Senate, not to mention the fact that it's already been done, to miserable reviews.

Perhaps they should be renamed the Youppies, in honour of the Expos Mascot Who Will Probably Bite The Dust. Youppi, in fact, was the first mascot to be thrown out of a Major league game. On Aug. 23, 1989 -- 10 years after the mascot arrived in Montreal -- the orange, hairy giant was ejected in the 11th inning after Dodgers manager Tommy Lasorda complained to the umpires about Youppi danced atop of the visitors' dugout.

The official Sports Amnesia nomination for new team would be the Washington Johnsons, in honour of the greatest pitcher in Washington baseball history, Walter "Big Train" Johnson. Of course, "Johnson" is also slang for dick - and wouldn't it make a great mascot, a giant dick - apropos for a city of politicians like DC.

In any event, by waiting so long to make the announcement, baseball has another royal cock up on its hands. Realistically, the new ownership could not take over until after next season has already started which means budgetary constraints, personnel decisions, decisions about what to name the team, what their logo should be, who their GM and manager should be, etc. - will be decided by the consortium of baseball owners that have run Les Expos into the ground for the last several seasons. A very ominous beginning, despite the obvious joy there must be in DC.

(Update: more bad news for Rangers reliever Cordero - in the top of the 11th, he just surrendered a two run homer on to Green's Hill at the 404 foot mark in dead centre field to Troy Glaus, giving the stinkin' Angels an 8-6 lead. A loss by the Rangers will mathematically eliminate them)

Postseason

I don't mind saying that of the several teams with hopes of making the postseason, the Angels and the Astros are the only two teams I definately don't want to see make it. The Cubbies, in the midst of their annual choking free fall, have now lost four of their last five games (against the Mets and Reds of all teams), to allow the Astros to move ahead of them by a half game with a game in hand in the NLWC race. The Astros are now tied with the SF Giants for the NLWC as the Giants face the Padres in SD - winning would put the Giants up by a half game)

(Update: The Rangers new season hits record holder, Michael Young with 211, made the final out against Angels reliever Troy Percival to seal the Rangers season in an 8-7 loss in the bottom of the 11th. Now the question is whether to switch to the Giants NL chase tied in the 7th against the Padres 3-3 OR to see whether or not the A's can keep pace with the Angels at Seattle - A's are currently leading the Mariners 2-1 in the 7th - switched to the Giants game - listened to it yesterday at 4 in the morning as the Padres were virtually eliminated from the NL postseason)

So, looking ahead at the knowns of the NL postseason, we've got the Cardinals, Atlanta and the LA Dodgers as likely or certain division champs and the Cubs, Astros, and Giants as possible wildcards - if the Cubs or Astros make the WC, the Cards would open against the Dodgers and the Braves, certain first round losers would face the Cubs or the Astros. If the Giants squeak in as WC, the Cards would face them in the first round and the Dodgers would face the Braves. Since the All Star break, the Cards are 1-5 against the Astros, 2-4 against the Giants and 4-2 against the Dodgers. The Cardinals would be best off rooting for the Astros or the Cubs to win the WC and set up an exciting NLCS against their NL Central rivals. The only sure thing is that whomever the Braves face will advance to the NLCS.

In the AL postseason, you've got the Yankees, Twins, Red Sox and either the Angels or the A's. Depending entirely on how the Twins fare the rest of the way (tied with the Angels for the best record after the Yankees), the Red Sox would face either the Twins or the Angels/A's. If the Angels win the AL West and finish with a better record than the Twins (likely, considering the Twins have lost six of eight since clinching its third straight AL Central title) - then the Red Sox would open against the Angels and the Yankees against the Twins. Of course, if the Twins suddenly wake up in their season ending series against the Toronto Blue Jays and earn the second best record in the AL, the Twins would face the Sox and the Yankees would face either the Angels or the A's.

The danger mouse is of course, the Angels. (update: The A's have now fallen behind the Mariners, 3-2 in the 8th) - since the All Star break, they've got a 2-5 record against the Red Sox, swept the Yankees at Yankee Stadium and were an indecisive 3-3 against the Twins. If like me, you're rooting for a Yankees-Red Sox ALCS, you'd be best rooting for the Angels (if they win the AL West) to have a better record than the Twins (meaning a Twins-Yankees, Angels-Red Sox opening pair of series).

Oh good god, it's mind-boggling! If this, then that. If that, then this.

Homeside Baseball Blogs

Props for the season to the following bloggers who have kept me updated on their home teams with wit and verve not normally associated with baseball reportage:

East Coast Agony (Mets & Red Sox)

"At long last, erstwhile Expos GM Omar Minaya has reportedly gnawed through the steel chains binding him to that sinking ship of a franchise and escaped in the nick of time. He washed up on the idyllic sandy shore of baseball unemployment, and found himself beset by two choices: he could wait for a passing ship to pick him up and return him to civilization, or he could agree to rule a host of ignorant cannibalistic savages who populated the island, used dollars for kindling, and traded their young for the aged and infirm of other tribes."

Uncouth Sloth (Cubs)

"I'll leave the thoughtful analysis to fellas like Cub Reporter. Today, I'm going to tell you what I think of the St. Louis Cardinals, who rolled over like coke whores last night for Houston.

It's bad enough that we still have to worry about shit stains like Jeff Kent and Roger Clemens. But if we had a REAL commissioner, who gave a rat's ass about things like competition and fair play, there would be an order for the goddamned puke-spewing Cardinals to play ball this week. There's no way the two teams should be allowed to conspire to keep us out of the playoffs. This isn't the motherfucking WWF..this is baseball, Porter, we play on a real diamond. Except for Rolen, they're all a disgrace to the game.

It starts with the crank-cooking pudwhack who shits out the lineup card. Sure, fucking LaRussa hates the obnoxious Dusty Baker. But isn't it the true test of just how much of a maxi-pad LaRussa is, when he comes out of it looking way more fucked up than Baker? You don't see Dusty getting all red, spitting, waving around like a raghead fertility dancer. LaRussa is a filthy-ass pig who dives in dumpsters behind proctologist's offices looking for something to eat, and spends his off days wiping his scabby, infected dick all over the curtains in fancy restaurants in St. Louis."

Three words, Anger Management, baby. But a great daily rant.

and since they were referenced above, yes, The Cub Reporter

Waiting For Boof:

"...At several points during the season, Giants fans wanted to tie Tomko in a mail sack and toss him into the Bay. Metaphorically, of course. Or perhaps lock him in a dark room, having someone in a Lou Seal costume shoot t-shirts at him from a t-shirt gun while repeatedly screaming, “IF YOU DON’T RETIRE, I AM GOING TO BURN DOWN YOUR HOUSE! DO YOU HEAR ME?” Metaphorically, of course."

I sense a recurrant theme of anger and frustration in these pennant chases. Imagine that.

Against the Grain (Milwaukee Brewers, which in itself, is amazing - who'd have thunk there was a Brewer fan out there willing to write a daily blog who hadn't drown himself in misery and bad Midwestern beer already? Every time I think how much it sucks to watch the Idiot Explosion at Shea Stadium, I just remind myself gently, hey - at least you're not a Brewers fan!)

"THIS JUST IN, MILTON BRADLEY IS A PSYCHO
If you haven't seen the highlights from last night, I'm sure you will eventually. A fan at Dodger Stadium threw a bottle at Dodgers outfielder MILTON BRADLEY and then Bradley went back to be Milton Bradley...That is in essence a psychopath.

I understand that the fan is completely wrong for throwing a bottle at Bradley, but his reaction was inappropriate and absolutely insane. His team is in the final week of the regular season, that has them playing the second place Giants this weekend for what could very well determine the NL West Champion and now the Dodgers will be without one of their best players."

Others well worth visiting:

Petco Padres
El Lefty Malo (Giants)
Across the Seams (Giants)

Admittedly, I'm not much of an AL fan. My favourite team plays in the NL, the AL has a DH, which I've always hated (unless of course, it's existence allows the Mets to dump Mike Piazza on some AL team before next season) plus, I revile the two teams which are considered the best in the AL (Yankees and Red Sox), I abhor the Angels for reasons I've never been able to express other than the listless retelling of the word "Anaheim", AND, the only team I've ever been remotely interested in the AL, the Orioles, despite Peter Assholangelos, haven't fielded a competetive team in about a decade or so. About the only thing the AL has going for it is the hysterical hatred between the Yankees and the Red Sox which is simultaneously sickening and fascinating.

Elephants in Oakland - quality writing.

Mariner Musings -

(Update: Giants and Padres are still tied 3-3 in the top of the 10th and the A's have lost to the Mariners 4-2 giving the Angels the lead in the AL West and reaffirming the A's with the Cubs as probable choke co-champions of 2004, snatching away the title from the two-time reigning champion Seattle Mariners)

Cub Demise

"Not since the concrete fell has anything at Wrigley Field crumbled so hard and so fast.

A strike away from winning a very big game, the Cubs blew it, if I may borrow a couple of Dusty Baker's favorite words, big-time."

Mike Downey's analysis in the Trib today on The Crumbling Cubs

(More updates: As it nears 6:30 in the morning here in Warwickshire, the Padres have the bases loaded with no outs in the bottom of the 10th following two consecutive Giant errors and former Met reject Jay Payton at the plate...

Payton grounds to second base, force at home despite a terrible throw, bases loaded, one down. Mark Loretta coming to the plate.

Fly ball to right field. Ball is dropped, no, caught -- Giants RFer Dustin Mohr caught the ball and then fell down allowing the winning run to tag up and score, uncontested. Oh Misery are the Giants as well! Padres win in the bottom of the 10th.

Astros take the NL Wild card lead.

Ugh.