The Week Ahead

From mlb:

"Monday-Tuesday

Marlins at Nationals: Florida's young starters make first trip to D.C., new home of NL East-leading Nationals.
Mets at Phillies: Red-hot Mets, winners of six of last seven, head to Philly tied with Braves, Marlins and Phillies, all two games behind Nationals.
Twins at White Sox: Matchup of rivals and early AL Central co-leaders.
Blue Jays at Red Sox: Surprising Jays get stiff test in Beantown.

Wednesday-Thursday Series

Cubs at Cardinals: Chicago and St. Louis, preseason favorites in NL Central, renew their heated rivalry.
Braves at Nationals: Braves next up to take shot at NL East leaders in nation's capital.
Red Sox at Orioles: Red Sox take on AL East's surprise, the division-leading Orioles.
Athletics at Mariners: Battle between two of three co-leaders in AL West, in which Angels are also on top and Rangers are just a half-game back.

Weekend series

Orioles at Blue Jays: Early AL East surprises go head-to-head in Toronto.
Athletics at Angels: Another matchup of leaders in what promises to be a hotly contested division all season.
Dodgers at Rockies: Los Angeles, sporting an MLB-best 9-2 mark, gets its first Mile High test of the season.
Reds at Marlins: Homer- (and strikeout-) happy Reds face Marlins' young fireballers in battle of power vs. power.

King George And His Beautiful Balloon Of Hot Air

"Enough is enough," The Boss said after an 8-4 loss to the Orioles, the Yankees' fourth straight defeat and eighth in 10 games.

"I am bitterly disappointed, as I am sure all Yankee fans are, by the lack of performance by our team. It is unbelievable to me that the highest-paid team in baseball would start the season in such a deep funk.

They are not playing like true Yankees. They have the talent to win and they are not winning. I expect Joe Torre, his complete coaching staff and the team to turn this around."

Douchebag Gets First Payback

The cost of his season's tickets refunded to him. The douchebag who tried to interfere with smack help Gary Sheffield as he tried to catch that quasi infamous ball had his season's tickets revoked.

What an idiot. The first season he gets to watch his Red Sox defend their World Championships he's going to be watching it from the telly the rest of the year!

Joining him on the idiot parade is the fan who spilled beer on Sheffield who was prohibited from buying tickets for the rest of the season.

Yeah! Way to support your team!

DC Sports On The Rise

Tony Kornheiser, reeking of his typical schmaltz, sings the newest song of the season in DC Cluck If You Love The Nats.

"It's a terrific time for sports in Washington. The Nationals have a better record than the New York Yankees and the Boston Red Sox. The Wizards have a better record than the Los Angeles Lakers. The Redskins haven't had any players march in and ask to be traded in at least three days. Finally, there's something to do in May, June and July besides wait for Redskins camp to open. That feels good, doesn't it?"

Twins @ White Sox

Quick preview of another bloody series for first place in the AL Central from The Trib

Who's hot: The Twins have won six of their last seven with a combined ERA under 3.15. Sox wrecker Torii Hunter has a team-leading three home runs and 12 RBIs despite a .239 average. Joe Crede has an eight-game hitting streak, and Paul Konerko has six home runs in his first 13 games.
Who's not: Twins regulars Shannon Stewart (.220), Lew Ford (.220) and Michael Cuddyer (.231) are off to slow starts. Sunday's 0-for-4 dropped Jermaine Dye's average to .190. Tadahito Iguchi was 1-for-18 before his RBI single Sunday.

Around the Links

Things You Don't Do To Big Z via Goatriders of the Apocalypse.

Manny Ramirez Stuffing His Gob With McDonalds via Destination Dynasty

"...When I interrupted, bringing up Hee-Seop Choi and delivering my own "I told you" he's a stiff speech.

"I'm very confident in his ability," DePodesta insisted. "He's still a young player who is still getting his legs under him."

I thought the problem was Choi couldn't hit; I had no idea he was still learning to walk, which might explain why the Micro Manager vaulted Jason Grabowski ahead of Choi on Saturday night. The first big move this season." from TJ Simers

I know I've heard about Doug Christie's poosy-whipped whinge before but this is rich:

"Just when you thought you'd heard it all in the ongoing adventures of pampered professional millionaires, out marches Doug Christie, his ubiquitous wife and his histrionic sports agent.

In one of the most bizarre and comically entertaining interviews ever witnessed, the Christie clan went on with WFTV-Channel 9 sports anchor Dan Hellie this past week and attacked Magic General Manager John Weisbrod because -- are you ready for this? -- Weisbrod didn't protect poor, little Dougie from the mean ol' media. Shame on Weisbrod for not being able to write my column for me."

via Mike Bianchi, Orlando Sentinel

"Christie uses the word "ridiculous" numerous times during the Channel 9 interview, but nothing could be more laughable than the melodrama of his sports agent holding up for the cameras a plastic sandwich bag filled with indiscernible bone spurs taken from Christie's ankle during a recent surgery. This may go down as the most farcical scene in a televised interview since Dan Quayle was running for vice president.

It's no wonder VH1 chose the Christies for a reality show; these people are kookier than the Osbournes. Do they actually believe Weisbrod can dictate what is written here? What do they think this column is, anyway -- Jerry Greene's Cheap Seats?"