MERCY!

(Roger Clemens congratulated by catcher Michael Barrett as he leaves the game still with no official team for the 2006 season but impressive nonetheless...)

Needing a victory over the unlikely foils of South Africa, Team USA finally looked something akin to the dream team they should be aspiring to considering they are in a sense, the motherland of baseball to these step children countries looking for a massive upset, trouncing South Africa by a 17-0 score in a game called on account of the Mercy Rule.

Bearing in mind the quality of the opposition, it was still an impressive rout.

Roger Clemens, at 43, was still at his stifling best, allowing 1 hit in 4 1/3 innings whilst striking out 6. The oft-injured, former hopeful for Home Run King Junior Griffey blasted two homers, had four hits in four at-bats and drove in seven runs to raise his three game batting average to .750.

Having already suffered an embarassing loss to their northern neighbours, the Americans are not likely to lose another game in their round robin round against Japan, Mexico and Korea.

Not to count the proverbial chickens before hatching but this is, after all, Team USA, and whilst their next three opponents deserve respect and to be taken seriously, let's be honest, none of the three are top quality teams and certainly don't reach the level of the opponents in the other bracket. Besides, with Jake Peavey, a Dontrelle Willis who will be eager to make up for his crap game against Canada and Roger Clemens, all set to take the mound in the next three games, let's just say there shouldn't be any high scoring opponents.

Meanwhile, Team USA's first opponent will be Japan which in theory, is a team with the second biggest professional league in the world.

"This will be a dogfight," said Peavy, the San Diego ace who will start for Team USA. "The fundamentals of Japanese players are probably twice as sound as we are. They play the game like it's supposed to be played from pitch one to the last one thrown. We're going to have to be on top of our game to win, but I expect the boys to show up with a lot of intensity and do what we have to do to win."

U.S. manager Buck Martinez plans to approach the second round more like the regular season - likely letting his regulars go deeper into games and staying with the most productive bats, while also making sure every player will be as prepared as possible to rejoin his team upon the WBC's conclusion.


Puerto Rico 12 Cuba 2


Mets Superhero Carlos Beltran sliding here, there and everywhere, trying hard to get injured before he has another at-bat for the Mets...(well, not really but he'd damned well better be flying over the field with as much passion at Shea as he has at Hiram Bithorn Stadium...)

In a rather suprisingly easy victory, the Puerto Ricans, led by homers from Carlos Beltran and Bernie Williams, routed the Cubans 12-2 as both teams advanced to the second round and another mercy rule was applied, this time after 7 innings.

Puerto Rico will now join Cuba, the Domincan Republic and Venezuela in the deadlier of the two remaining round robin brackets.

Their first opponent will be the Dominicans, followed by Venezuela and then Cuba.

Netherlands 10 Panama 0

San Francisco Giants minor leaguer Shairon Martis pitched the first no-hitter in the World Baseball Classic, leading the Netherlands over Panama 10-0 Friday in yet another game stopped because of the tournament's mercy rule, this time after seven innings.

Ending the game on his final and 65th pitch (the most allowable in the first round,) Martis didn't strike out a single Panamanian but made the most of an early 5-0 lead to humiliate the Panamanians who, less star-studded than their Dominican and Puerto Rican counterparts, nonetheless, now hold the distinction of the only team to be held hitless.

Domincan Republic 6 Australia 4


Domincan Wily Mo Pena let's fans know they are ready to roll into the next round with their undefeated debut.

The Dominicans continued to push through into the second round with their third consecutive victory, this time a harder-than-imagined victory over an Australian team which had been shut out by Venezuela and Italy in their previous two games.

Australia, even with their enemic batting were still not no-hit like the Panamanians though.

The Dominicans finished undefeated and are perhaps the favoured team in the next round unless Team USA continue to show their mettle against the tougher competition.


Red Sock David Papi Ortiz demonstrates what a mountain of a man he is standing next to Pedro "Happy" Feliz (left) and Miguel Tejada (number 10)...

They will open the next round against Puerto Rico in a star-studded affair, followed by Cuba and Venezuela.

******

Meanwhile, the exhibition season continues on in the background and the guess here is now that players have seen the passion and coverage of this World Baseball Classic there will be more enthusiasts joining, rather than skipping out of the tournament next time around.

*****WHITE SOX DETOX******

The White Sox, who won last year's World Series without a 20 game winner or a .300 hitter, continued to hear flack from jettisoned players.

First it was the Big Hurt Frank Thomas, disappointed that the White Sox dropped him with little fanfare, was called "an Idiot" by GM Ken Williams after whingeing for the billionth time in public about how "mistreated" he was.

Thomas said he and Williams didn't see eye-to-eye after Williams became the general manager following the 2000 season. Thomas also regargled, in various tones of whinge, bitterness upon bitterness that his team of 16 seasons didn't feel the need to hold on to a guy, albeit great, who has spent the better part of several seasons more injured than healthy.

Hmmm. Loud mouth and oft-injuried rapidly ageing first baseman and DH or World Series MVP....difficult choice, Frank. Hope you hit 40 for the A's because I love seeing players proving GMs wrong.



Willaims also noted "If you go out there and ask any one of my players or staff members, we don't miss him," during a profound anti-Big Hurt rant "We don't miss his attitude. We don't miss the whining. We don't miss it. Good riddance. See you later."

Now it's infamous hothead and team player self-centred twat, Carl Everett. Everett said his former team lacks a vocal leader and Konerko isn't the answer. He criticized the moves general manager Ken Williams made during the offseason, saying, "They are not going to have the same chemistry."

This guy Everett is good: a great career in ironic stand-up comedy ahead of him.

Everett, with all the leadership qualities you might expect from someone who has bordered on the positively psychotic before.



Uncle Carl the Apostolic Christian is certain to provide all those wonderful leadership qualities again some year in his new role as Seattle Mariner mascot.

SI's Jacob Luft helps readers excoriate him here:

Some of Uncle Carl's previous outbursts,

Wrigley Field needs to be "imploded."

Tiger Woods is not an athlete.

"Gays being gay is wrong. Two women can't produce a baby, two men can't produce a baby, so it's not how it's supposed to be. ... I don't believe in gay marrages and I don't believe in being gay."

"It's proven that 99 percent of baseball fans have no idea what they're watching."

Some Mariners fans are clearly not looking forward to a Carl Everett joining them, like U.S.S. Mariner in a juicy timeline which pretty much sums up a career of controversy.

One of my favourites:

"...Gets hit in the head by a cell phone 4/19/2003 thrown by a fan in Oakland. The fan gets charged (outcome unknown). Everett, who takes the phone and throws it over a wall and hits a stadium employee, is not charged..."

*****

A's pitchers' pre-game routines is an interesting look at how Harden, Blanton and Zito get ready, what food they eat, sleeping patterns and bathing habits. Probably more than you want to know about a baseball player but it's always to have an insight of what goes on in a player's head so long as it isn't Carl Everett's bobblehead.