Holy Helix, Batman!

You've got to wonder how a team like the Helix High School in suburban San Diego managed to cough up two Heisman candidates in one season. Not surprisingly, the 2000 Helix High team went undefeated.

Heisman officials said that these are the first high school teammates ever invited to New York as finalists. Reggie Bush and Alex Smith played on the same team but Bush's talent overshadowed Smith's in high school, as Smith's primary job in Helix's Wing-T offense was to hand off to Bush.

Apparently, Helix High is still going strong and will be playing in the Division II semifinals this weekend.

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On the other end of the spectrum of Heisman candidates comes the University of Michigan's defensive lineman Larry Harrison Jr. Harrison allegedly masturbated on the porch of a house occupied by several women near the U-M campus shortly after midnight.

Now here's the funny part:

Ann Arbor police Lt. Chris Heatley declined to give details of how Harrison, 6-feet-3, 313 pounds, was identified as a suspect.

Hmmm. 300 pound man masturbating outside a house in Ann Arbor. Must happen all the time, how can we match the profile? Probably not a member of the cross country team...

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Oh the dread of Iggles fans: shall they go for 15-1 or shall they rest on their laurels?

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Is This A Yogi-ism?

Yogi Berra, well known not only for playing for the Yankees for ten championship seasons but perhaps equally for his Yogi-isms like "This is like deja vu all over again.", "Baseball is 90% mental -- the other half is physical." and "Think! How the hell are you gonna think and hit at the same time?" to name but a few, has finally spoken up about Jason Giambi and steroids.

Berra said steroids were dangerous for players and the fans who look up to them. "They could die from that stuff," he said.

Yeah, that too.

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More BS BCS

It caused quite an uproar in some parts of Alabama that the undefeated Auburn Tigers were slighted from the BCS Championship in favor of Oklahoma and USC. When it was revealed that a certain writer who covers rival Alabama's football team had ranked Auburn THIRD, not second, a slap in the face to all Alabamans, Huntsville Times writer Paul Gattis has responded:

"I thought about other family members who were subjected to undeserved and ridiculous stress this week as some Auburn fans presumably attempted to get me fired from my job by spreading rumors so ludicrous that they must have a ZIP code from Fantasyland.

OK, Auburn fans. You've filled my e-mail box with about 300 requests, wanting to know how I can be so stupid as to not vote your team higher in the poll. Or at least higher than the Oklahoma Sooners, a team that's been so bad this year that it has the same 12-0 record as your beloved Tigers.

You wanted a rationale. You wanted an explanation.

Here it is.

I think Oklahoma is the best team in the country. I think Southern Cal is the second-best team in the country. I think Auburn is the third-best team in the country.

And don't bother sending another 300 e-mails. I got the message the first time.

I'm stupid..."

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Something I didn't know about Urban Meyer, the guy who Notre Dame THOUGHT would be their next head coach but who ENDED UP being the next head coach for the University of Florida instead:

His wife grabs alot of headlines.

I have to admit, when I'd been reading a few articles in various Utah papers about Urban, there was the invariable reference to "the telegenic face of Utah football" being his wife, Shelley. And looking at her, well, for a football coach's wife, I guess she isn't all that bad, but believe me, she's no Ali Landry though, is she then?

In any case, it appear the people in Utah are not too happy with Florida.

Oh yeah, and from the "I Thought I'd Seen Everything But Obviously Haven't" Department, it appears that the assistant to Notre Dame's president has shaved her head to protest Tyrone Willingham's firing as football coach, saying she will remain bald until the Irish win a national championship."

Personally, for those who have to look at this hideous face every morning at work, I recommend that the rest of the staff of Notre Dame's president put together a collection for a paper bag for Chandra Johnson to wear over her newly-shaved head.


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Say what you want but this Sunday's Chelsea-Arsenal match promises to be one of the most exciting of the season.

Keep an eye out for the Chelsea FC Blog for accounts of the ultimate demise of my least favourite team, Arseholenol.