Thursday, March 25, 2004

Whipping Boys

For those of you who think the RF slot in Shea is cemented, you might be curious to note that Sports Amnesia's 2004 whipping boy, Roger Cedeno Is Up For Grabs.

"He's played left, center and right fields, and all of them equally horrendously," the ad reads. ". . . He used to be quite fast, but as he's gotten older and somewhat fatter on his contract, even that last vestige of value has left him. He cannot run the bases, he cannot play defense, he cannot hit for average."

And yes, on the second day in a row that Wonderkind Reyes was able to take batting practice without hurting himself or his delicately girlish gams, hundred year old hurler, Al Leiter discovered a cranky shoulder.

I see a consistent theme developing for the season and it spells out M-E-T-S I-N L-A-S-T P-L-A-C-E.

The one redeeming factor of yet another disppointing Mets season of losses and excuses is that it will hopefully result in the dismissal of Hula Howe. I've done some research on the matter and there does not appear to be a Fire Art Howe website yet. Sounds like a need crying out. Sports Amnesia will work on this and give a solution tomorrow.

Speaking of whipping boys, Sports Amnesia's Whipping Boy of 2003, Armandogeddon, for no apparent reason, was booed by his own fans when he entered for the ninth inning Thursday. "He got the same reception as last year," Mets general manager Jim Duquette said. "Too bad for him." Boo Hoo Benitez, who entered with the score tied at 1, got Danny Garcia on a pop-up to preserve the tie (the game was stopped after 11 innings with the score still tied at 1). It was the first time Benitez faced his former club since he was traded to the Yankees last season. "It's in the past, man," Benitez said. "I've got a new team, a new life. I'll be fine." . . . . Unless the Marlins have to play in any meaningful games this season they aren't already winning by twenty runs, that is.

*****

We are getting perilously close to the start of the season. The Yankees have already left for the confounding cultural differences of Japan. Even though he heartily endorsed the trip, King George is not following his minions to Japan. Of course, that could be for his fear of a terrorist attack on the Yankees. Police escorts will usher the Yankees everywhere. Black Hawk helicopters will wing the team to Camp Zoma, for a meet-and-greet with American soldiers.

Meanwhile, can anyone resist the poetic (in)justice of A-Rod Getting Hurt Against the Red Sox?

*****

Wouldn't this make for a great Game Seven of the 2004 World Series?

Cubs 2, A's 1 with Sammy Sosa getting three hits and driving in the go-ahead run and Kerry Wood allowing a run in 6 1-3 innings? In the real world, the Cubs confirmed that P Mark Prior will start the season on the DL. He is expected to be able to return during the team's first homestand, which is from April 12-19.


*****

A few days ago I mocked the Padres' chances this season because they noted that this season's likely number one draft pick was better than anyone they currently had in their rotation. Long Beach State's Jered Weaver, the man they were on about, was at it again last night, striking out 16 in six innings.

*****

Food for Thought: The Mets aren't willing to give up a pitcher who may or may not be good in a few years for what could be the Superstar of their lineup, Alfonso Soriano. Yesterday, Soriano homered to beat the Royals and has already had a 12 game hitting streak in Spring Training. He is currently hitting .347 with 4 stolen bases and a homer in 15 games.

*****

Bookmarks Revealed: Yeah, it might be a little late in the game but there once was a nice petition for Mets owner Freddy BoomBoom Wilpon to sign Vlad courtesy of East Coast Agony.

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